


Blood and Heat: An Anthology

by justalongthemirroroferised



Category: Horizon: Zero Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Canon Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Eventual Smut, F/M, Horizon: Zero Dawn AU, Horizon: Zero Dawn Spoilers, Ilovethesetwodon'tjudgeme, Non-Canon Relationship, Sexual Content, Violence, trash son Nil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2019-03-24
Packaged: 2019-09-11 21:51:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16860919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justalongthemirroroferised/pseuds/justalongthemirroroferised
Summary: Aloy is a Seeker of the Nora, anointed by the Matriarchs and chosen by GAIA to save the world. But can she resist the pull of the darkness when it looks at her with silver eyes? AloyxNil Anthology. Stories appear in chronological order as per the plot of the game.





	1. First Warning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A heat is ignited. Aloy discovers something about herself that is both alarming and addictive.

**Hi guys! I definitely should be writing/finishing "You're so Blind" but I just finished playing Horizon and can't get these two out of my head! SO, this is going to be a collection of interconnected one-shots. Rated M for mature, it's not fluffy. I'm thinking it'll only be 3-4 chapters (you can quote me on this later when I throw that out the window).**

**Please don't forget to review, they are the fuel to my creative fire!**

* * *

The wind howled.

Gusts of icy air flowed across the ground, whistling into nooks and crannies and stealing the warmth from the bones of the bandits who huddled on top of their hilly fortress. The prisoners moaned quietly as the cold bent their bodies inwards, twisting their bound wrists tightly behind them as their muscles rebelled and their limbs stung from lack of blood flow.

Sentries paced, bowed from the cold, keeping their torches close. Too close for safety, they carelessly spoiled their night vision with the light from the flames. The flickering light did little to warm them, but not one of them complained. They stubbornly kept up the watch, no one wished to feel the sting of the lash. Ever since the killings had started, the bandits were growing increasingly more paranoid.

It was too quiet, this night. The kind of pervasive quiet that foretold a grim dawn.

There were no watcher's footsteps, no huffing and bellowing of tramplers and striders. No clicking of machinery or even the steady tattoo of ravager footsteps pacing over the eastern ridge could be heard. Even the bellowbacks seemed to have withdrawn deep into the jungle. The lights of the forest were absent, the searchlights of the machines had been quietly snuffed out.

That was the first warning.

How foolish of the bandits to think that they would be able to survive the will of the flame-haired huntress. By the sun, they should have known better.

The second warning came with the discovery of a corpse, neatly hidden in the long grass at the northern edge of the hideout at dusk. Death had come by way of an arrow, the wound so small and precise that the bandits had missed it; the arrowhead was still buried in the man's armpit. The dark blood and black sleeve had disguised the death signature of Aloy, the bane of the bandit clans.

Now, at midnight, she planned to make her move.

Rain pelted the ground and tiny rivers flowed down from the hill to soak Aloy's boots. She barely noticed, she was so intent on her focus' line of sight. Torches sputtered under the onslaught of water, marring her natural vision with thick smoke. She scanned again, taking stock of the bandit warriors. She kept her eye on the sniper closest to her, fully conscious of the alarm that stood directly behind the pacing sentry.

She was the last and final warning. She had come for only one thing; to see the end of the injustice wrought by these outlaws. The thought brought a dark pulse of heat flooding into her veins, and she calmly made a decision to strike.  _Their guards are down._

Reaching into her quiver, she selected a precision arrow. As she drew back her bowstring to take aim, she felt the familiar rush of satisfaction as the sinew tightened, the slow, deliberate sound a sharp contrast to the rapid beating of her heart.

That's when she heard the rustling behind her.

The man moved so smoothly that she was able to track him by the absence of sound.  _Right on time,_ she thought darkly, secretly both glad and frustrated by the appearance of her hunting partner.

They hadn't discussed an attack on this bandit base, but somehow he was always able to figure out what she was planning. It was irksome, the way that he was able to read her mind.

His footsteps were so quiet that they were nearly silent, and she didn't have to turn around to know who was making his stealthy crawl towards her. She turned anyway, wanting to see the whites of his eyes. The arc of her focus had him scanned and pinned even before she had her bow lined up with his heart. He froze, his hands open, palms spread. He wasn't looking for a fight.

For now.

It was the game they played; he would pretend to hunt her, and she would make sure that he never forgot how quickly she could kill him. She didn't know why she hadn't killed him already; he was more than deserving of her contempt.

"You should know better than to sneak up on me, Nil."

"Hardly. It would take all of my skill to truly do so."

"You spoiled my shot." She replied coldly, refusing to let him startle her.

Her bow lowered slightly as Nil inclined his head in greeting, the plumes of his headdress quivering in the rain.

"We both know that it'll take more than me to make you miss." The silver flash of his eyes no longer fazed her, but she couldn't help the sheen of sweat that had suddenly appeared on her palms.  _Damn him._

His voice was low, barely raised above a whisper, but Aloy felt as though he may as well have shouted. The jump of adrenaline flooding through her veins made her heartbeat quicken, and she lowered her weapon.

"It doesn't matter. Stay out of my way, I'm not playing your sick killing game."

"Oh Aloy, you still have so much to learn." He murmured, sinking down into the grass next to her. "I don't play  _games_."

She should have been angry to hear her name leave his lips in such tones of reverence, but there was something about the way that he'd said it that made her want to hear it again.  _Rost would not be impressed. Don't lose your head because a pretty man said your name! Focus, Aloy._

His slow smirk quickened her heartbeat even further, and she took a small step away from him, farther into the long grass. "If you're here, you may as well help me."

"You don't have to ask. I am, as always, eager to hunt."

"It's easier to hunt if you keep your mouth shut." She half-snarled, pressing down farther into the grass as a sentry passed by their hiding spot.

Without any hesitation, she pounced, taking the man out with a quick spear thrust to the spine. He went down quickly, the quiet gurgling of his blood leaving his body dampened by the pouring rain. Aloy used her momentum to drag the body back into the grass, counting on the limited visibility of the water flooding down to prevent the snipers from spotting them.

"One less piece of scum to share this land with." Nil commented quietly, now so close behind her that the feathers on his headdress tickled her cheek. "The satisfaction makes the kill even sweeter, doesn't it."

It wasn't a question. He knew exactly how to push her buttons, but she determinedly ignored him. "Stop, Nil. Let's just get this over with."

"Aloy, it's useless to fight it. Let your fury guide your arrows." His quiet chuckle sent another shiver shooting down her spine. He radiated danger, and she couldn't wait to get away.

She fought her instinct to shy away, and determinedly made her way to another spot of tall grass.  _I have a good shot from here. First, take out the sniper, then shoot the alarm. When Nil ignites this firestorm, I don't want any surprises._

She very slowly made her way closer to the walls, laying traps as she went. Nearly invisible blast wires crisscrossed the ground, the pattern spelling out a quick and painful death for those who were dumb enough to blunder into them.

Aloy deliberately ignored Nil, trying to focus as he followed her towards the edge of the improvised moat that the bandits had hurriedly dug into the hillside.

" _What?_ " She finally hissed back at him, tired of the tiny clucking noises that he kept making as she set her traps.

"The traps. I know you don't need them."

"They make things easier. I take no pleasure in killing, unlike you." She snapped, unnerved by how close he was. "You're interfering with my focus, you're right in the middle of the sightline."

"You don't seem to take pleasure in anything," he replied quietly, the timbre of his voice sending jolts of electricity deep into her belly.

The rumble of his voice behind her left ear made a tiny part of her want to lean back against him. The other, larger, part of her screamed for her to either run or punch him. She needed to lose some of her nervous energy, she was on edge.  _It's his fault._

She settled for grabbing another arrow, notching it and raising her weapon to point at a sniper huddled with her torch. Aloy rolled her eyes, the woman was a beacon in the dark.  _Do these people ever learn?_

"Of course I do." She muttered, annoyed with herself for rising to the barb.

"But do you really  _feel_ anything when you do it?"

"Do what?" She drew back her bow, using her elbow to shove him away. She didn't know what she wanted to hear, but not for the first time, he was making her nervous. He moved without complaint, content to watch her kill the sentry in the ramparts above them.

"When you kill a bandit and feel their heart stutter around the metal of your spear," He murmured, his scarred hands tracing along the edge of his knife. "You don't stop to watch as the light leaves their eyes?"

"No," she snapped, grunting quietly as her bowstring snapped across her cheek. The arrow whistled through the air, hitting the sniper in the eye. She crumpled without making a sound.

Aloy despised the rush of feral triumph that filled her; she wasn't like Nil. But she feared that she was becoming more like him as they spent more time together.

She knew exactly what he was talking about, the frantic pumping of a dying heart and the look of shock that passed over the face of a dying man wasn't something that she could easily forget.

Just like she couldn't forget the way that her own heart beat faster when she took her mark on her next unwitting victim. She would never admit it out loud, especially not to Nil.

But he knew that she felt it. His small smirk deepened and he brushed past her, heading for another tuft of long grass. She knew that her eyes gleamed in the dark, and her expression turned cold and cruel when she was taking her mark. She knew that she was a predator, and that made the kill satisfying, whether she wanted it to be or not.

_I am not taking pleasure in this._ She told herself firmly, staring daggers at Nil's back. She could feel the smugness radiating off of his skin, and it took all of her restraint not to follow him and make sure that he understood that he was a monster.  _I'm doing this for the people of this valley._

But that would mean that he won. She decided that she wouldn't allow it.

Aloy changed direction, heading for the westernmost part of the camp. As soon as she was able, she took aim with her bow and disposed of the alarm, breathing a small sigh of relief as it deflated, spilling its precious cargo of blaze.

Taking a risk, she used a torch forgotten on the path to ignite a fire arrow. She took a deep breath and shot it into the heart of the camp, catching the attention of several of the bandits. Just as she'd hoped, the largest of them, carrying a deathbringer gun, surged out into the rain, intent on gunning her down. She watched from a distance as he and three of his companions blundered straight into the traps that she'd strung over the hill.

Not caring about what Nil was doing, she took advantage of the chaos and confusion to slip over the westernmost wall. She snuggled down into a patch of grass, fully hidden from the view of the snipers who patrolled the ramparts above her head. She watched for a time, using her focus to map the paths that the bandits took. She bit her lip in concentration, quietly relieved that Nil wasn't interfering with her.

She took down several of the bandits from that hiding place, drawing them in with well-timed chirps and strategic traps. The sounds of their dying sighs and the silent spreading of dark blood didn't bother her, which caused her some concern. She didn't have time to get sentimental in the middle of a bandit camp, she could mull it over later.

_Breathe, Aloy._

It wasn't until she was spotted rummaging through the pockets of one of the corpses that she felt adrenaline singing through her veins. The battle cry that the bandit slugger had let out was his undoing.

She was going to fight with all that she had, she didn't want him to raise the alarm and bring the troops of the fortress down upon her head. So she notched an arrow and took the bandit in the shoulder as he charged at her, his battleaxe held aloft. She winced as her shot missed her target of his neck, deterred by his crude armor.

He dropped his arm with a grunt of pain, but he still moved towards her. Her spear whistled out of the sheath on her back and she dropped her centre of gravity to meet him.

Fighting for her life had become second nature to Aloy, and she was so consumed with snuffing out her opponent that she didn't pay Nil any mind.

* * *

He watched from the shadows as she used her bow and spear to defend herself, her fire-bright hair gleaming despite the seemingly endless rain. She dodged the clumsy blows of the bandit slugger easily, stabbing him with her spear in the stomach as he raised his own weapon for a death blow. She didn't hesitate to watch the bandit breathe his last breath, instead she wrenched her weapon from his body, ignoring the silent spill of dark blood that flowed down her spear and into her bracer.

She stood straight, throwing her hair out of her eyes as she regarded the body. Her chest heaved with exertion, and she had a look in her eye that Nil knew all too well. Try as she did to ignore it, he knew that she couldn't ignore the feral, primal part of her that savored winning a fight to the death. Her expression turned almost hazy for a fraction of a second before she caught herself, but it was enough. Her exotic features scrunched into a frown, and she was Aloy of the Nora once more.

He'd seen enough to know that he was right about her.

Nil watched, transfixed as she turned on her heel and darted back over the wall, leaving dark drops of blood shining in her wake in her haste to find a new hiding spot. The shimmering liquid seemed to hang for a moment in the air, and he closed his eyes as the battle-lust began to wind its way into his body once more.

He stepped out into the causeway of the fortress, inviting the advances of the remaining bandit warriors. He relished the sound of the alarm being raised, and didn't hesitate to surrender to the ancient song thundering through his veins. He sighed as he was cut by a stray arrow, the shaft quivering in the dirt as it passed by him. The pain only brought focus, made him  _finally_  feel alive.

He fought, spinning through the forms of his art. A tap here, a stab there, and the bodies began to fall around him. It was too easy to snuff out the scum, none of them were worth his full effort. He let out a sigh as he stabbed the final bandit through the heart that was filled with so much satisfaction that it could have been a moan of pleasure.

Perhaps it was. To Nil, there was very little difference between the two forces that drove men to madness. Pain and pleasure were two sides of the same shard, if you spun it fast enough there was no way to differentiate the two halves. It was in this merging of two powerful forces that Nil preferred to live his life.

_But Aloy, she lives on the side of pain. Perhaps it's all that she knows._

Finally, as he made his way up the final staircase, he caught another glimpse of the huntress. She fought like a thunderjaw, using every part of her body as an effective weapon. He watched, high in the tower, as she wove and spun, weaving the death chant of the bandits who were foolish enough to attack her. He would have been blind to miss the brightness of her eyes and the way that she efficiently flicked the blood from her weapons. If he was a religious man he would have taken her sun-lit red hair as an omen.

Perhaps she was an omen. A messenger from the sun sent to right the wrongs of the foolish men who laid claim to the earth. That, or she was simply extraordinary in her own right.

Either way, Nil would find out what she was.

Then, it was silent. A hush fell once more over the camp as the chaos ebbed away. Nil watched Aloy come back to her senses with some regret, he had never been able to sit as a spectator as she fought.  _What I wouldn't give to watch what she could do in the Sun Ring_ , he thought with some melancholy. He felt the flickering of something long dormant in his chest, but he couldn't see or feel a wound.

It concerned him. Without him noticing, the rules of the game that he played with the Nora girl had changed.

His eyes narrowed as Aloy left the remains of the fortress without so much as a backwards glance.

* * *

Aloy didn't look behind her as she left the camp, knowing full well that Nil would eventually follow her. She'd hurriedly freed the prisoners and left, content in the knowledge that the bandits wouldn't be able to terrorize the inhabitants of the mesa any longer.  She told herself that she didn't care if he chose not to. Determinedly, she darted into the forest and back towards Meridian, making for the ridge overlooking the mesa. She was grateful that the rain had let up, although she was soaked through.  _I tanned this leather well, it won't mold._

Pausing only to hunt several rabbits, she had a fire going and the meat dressed before Nil's shadow crept over the edge of her camp.

"I told you not to sneak up on me." She said by way of greeting, choosing to avoid his gaze as she lashed the rabbits to an old arrow shaft; it was as good a spit as any.

"Your flattery is as sharp as your arrows, be careful that you don't get cut." He replied cryptically, ignoring her glare as he sat down on the other side of the crackling fire. She refused to back down as his gaze met hers, even though the dark look in his eyes was making her stomach feel strange. It felt as though she might vomit, but not in an unpleasant way.

It frustrated her.  _Damn his stupid eyes and his stupid face._

"You don't stay in Meridian." His soft comment nearly made her jump; she'd been staring into the flames. A frown line appeared between her brows as she mulled over her answer. "I don't."

"Why?" His expression was openly curious, and she decided that she definitely preferred it when he was cryptic. It made him easier to read.

"I don't like cities." She found herself speaking before she'd thought it through and she nearly clapped her hand over her mouth.

"Can't cage a hunter?" He smirked over the fire at her, the shadows of the flickering flames casting an eerie glow over his features.

"Unlike you, I don't need a cage," she grumbled, turning the rabbits over the fire, "I grew up outside of a city."

"The noise, the smells, the aura of corruption, they're everywhere." Nil drawled, easing his knife out of his scabbard and toying with the edge. "It makes it difficult to follow a righteous path when you can see the scum parading in the streets, doesn't it?"

"That's not why."

"Isn't it."

"You completely missed the point." She said tiredly, not amused by his constant attempts to convince her that they were the same kind of person. "I like the stars and the sounds of the mountains, a city is too busy."

"Did I?"

"Yes."

"Perhaps the corruption that I speak of goes by a different name in your world, but they are one and the same in deeds."

"What could you possibly know about my life?" She demanded, ensnared by his bold statement. She was  _not_  going to let him take the upper hand. She  _had_  a moral compass, he did not.

"The Eclipse, the bandit clans, they're the same."

"No."

"Yes." He leaned forwards into the light, his eyes glittering. "They both seek to destroy the world, in different ways, but the end result is still the same. Someone has to dispose of the unworthy, why not us? You picked up that mantle willingly."

"I didn't."  She didn't offer any more information, the slaughter at the Proving was none of his business as far as she was concerned. 

"And yet, here you are." The look in his eye unnerved her.  She was irked that his words rang with a hint of truth.  

She didn't have a response, so she simply stared into the light of the fire.

Finally, he sighed and moved around the edge of the fire. She stared at him, startled and slightly afraid. He sat down next to her and didn't seem to notice that she scooted away, putting more distance between them.

"We aren't friends." She blurted out, suddenly very wary. "Barely allies, actually."

The corners of his mouth ticked up and he gestured at her face. "I'd be more convinced that we aren't if you weren't so comfortable with your enemy's blood on your face."

Her jaw clenched, her hand automatically raised to her cheek. He was right, the drops of blood from the battle had dried onto her skin, a macabre new collection of freckles. She hadn't even noticed the tightening of her skin as the spray had dried down.

That thought bothered her, and she fought back a shiver of revulsion.

"Aloy."

She turned towards him and was startled to see that he was wetting a scrap of fabric with a skin of water that he'd pulled from his pack. Warily, she accepted it, rubbing furiously at her face. He chuckled and grabbed her hand. "You're missing all of them. Let me."

She froze, and despite her better judgement, allowed him to move close enough to touch her.

His hand was warm, and she couldn't help noticing the calluses on his hands and the scars that crisscrossed his skin in a pattern like the straw thatches on Nora roofs. She sat shock-still as he gently removed the blood, somewhat shocked by how tender he was.

She didn't like it one bit.

Nil wasn't soft, or kind, or tender. It made her heartbeat stutter as the edge of his hand brushed across her lower lip. A jolt of what must have been lightning sang through her body, heating her blood and bringing a flush to her cheeks. She took a sharp breath, trying to slow her heartbeat as Nil shifted even closer, bringing his other hand up to cup her cheek as he wiped the coppery stains from her forehead.

Another bolt of heat went straight through her at the feel of his fingertips on her skin.

She moved as if by instinct, drawing her knife and slamming him to the ground. The breath hissed out of his lungs as he landed on his back, her knife pressed against his throat. The look he gave her was dark and clouded with something that both excited and frightened her.

" _Don't do that._ " Aloy hissed, her heartbeat thundering so loudly that she feared he might hear it. "I'm  _not_ some silly girl who will let you bed me."

He chuckled, a slow smirk spreading over his face. "I never said anything about bedding you. You have only to ask if that's what you want."

His laugh rumbled through her body and she was suddenly very aware that she was flush against him, still straddling him with her weapon pressed to his jugular. She scoffed and moved away, pausing only when his hand snaked up her hip to hold her in place. She froze, unsure whether to press her knife into his skin and kill him or wait to see what he was doing.

The heat in his eyes pinned her as she struggled to understand what was happening to her body. Something primal had taken her by the throat and held her fast, she was transfixed by the curve of his jaw and the slight sheen of sweat that still covered his chest.

She wasn't kept waiting long, and Nil's quiet words snapped her out of her trance.

"You still haven't accepted that you're a huntress, Aloy."

The way that he said her name was like a prayer, slipping easily from his tongue as he lowered his voice. "Of course I have-"

"No. You haven't."

They stared at each other for a few seconds, and Aloy was uncomfortable to realize that her heartbeat hadn't slowed, and his blood was thundering through his veins as quickly as her own. She felt his pulse against the metal of her blade.

It felt like battle-fever winding through her skin, but different, darker somehow. The pressure building in her chest and between her thighs frustrated her, and she could feel her expression softening, despite her attempts to keep the upper hand.

She felt his muscles tense a split second before he moved, flipping them over and pinning her with little effort. She felt her knife fall out of her hand as his chest came to rest against hers. All that she could see was the striking silver of his eyes this close, and she felt his breath ghosting over her lips as he finally spoke. She knew that she should fight back, but she found herself to be surprisingly boneless.

"A girl asks, Aloy. But a huntress _takes what she wants_."

His mouth was a hair's breadth from her own, and she felt the overwhelming urge to close the distance between them flooding through her body.

So she gave into it. Arching upwards and meeting his lips with her own, desperate to take the pressure off, she grabbed a fistful of his coarse hair. She wasn't gentle, attacking him with teeth and tongue and not stopping until he made a sound that was almost a grunt of pain.  _A moan. That's what that is._

She felt a surge of triumph, and took his lower lip between her teeth again, trying to force him to repeat the noise. His hand fisted in her hair and she found to her surprise that the slight sting wasn't painful. His mouth tasted like metal, and smoke, and something darker, something that could only be Nil. She felt her aggression softening, her body responding so enthusiastically to his touch that felt like she might burst.

She tensed when his hand smoothed up her side, coming to rest at the tie of her armor.  Before she could think, he'd loosened the knot and slipped her chestplate off.  The feel of his callused hand running along her collarbone was shocking and arousing in equal measure.  

He must have sensed her hesitation, letting go of her hair and cupping her face as he abruptly softened the kiss. His mouth slanted over hers with less ferocity, his tongue running softly across hers as she felt herself clutching at his vest like her life depended on it. He knew that he'd taken his victory, he didn't have anything to prove.  

Finally, they broke apart, breathing hard.

She saw herself reflected in his eyes from the firelight and shivered when she saw how feral she looked. Her hair was mussed, and she knew that she had dropped the pretense of control altogether. It frightened her, the way that he examined her. He leaned down to capture her lips once more and she snapped back to her senses as she felt the hardness of his arousal pressing against her.

She made a split second decision and bit him, hard. He snaked backwards, his hand drawing immediately to wipe at the bead of blood collecting on his lip. She scrambled to her feet, putting distance between them. Her chest heaved as she fought to get herself back under control, and she hurriedly scrubbed her mouth with the back of her hand.

Nil said nothing, simply watched her stalk to the other side of the fire with hazy eyes. She glanced over her shoulder to see him lick the blood from his lips, still watching her with a hungry expression.

"I'm leaving.  _Don't_ follow." She blurted, grabbing her pack and making for Meridian as fast as her legs would carry her. Her whistle echoed through the darkness and she breathed a sigh of relief as she heard the thundering gait of her strider mount coming towards her. She snuck a glance over her shoulder and wasn't surprised to see Nil's shadow outlined by the firelight.

Safely mounted and moving towards the city, she finally allowed herself to brush her fingers across her kiss-swollen lips. The fire inside her hadn't been dampened in the slightest by Nil's touch, it felt like she'd thrown a can of blaze on it.

"Damn it!" She groaned, her head in her hands. "What are you doing? I don't have time for this!"

But a tiny bubble of excitement had blossomed in her chest. The rules of the game had changed, and she knew that her bandit hunts with Nil would never be the same.

She wasn't the same.

She steered her mount into the mesa, determined to find a way to distract herself. She needed to think about something else besides the enigmatic man who tasted of blood and heat.

The next bandit camp would be different. She, Aloy, had to stay in control.


	2. Second Warning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another bandit camp. Another confrontation.

The mountains cut into the sky like metal shards.  Clouds of red clay dust scattered to the wind as a herd of tramplers made their slow, plodding way through the valley.  Nil closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath, savoring the cold snap of the air that swirled into his lungs. 

Today, he would hunt.  

He grinned, an expression fierce and intimidating.  His teeth flashed in the faint light, and he felt a thrill of anticipation twist through his veins.  

Finally, he would taste the blood in the breeze as the Voice of Our Teeth sent arrows shooting through the air.  Just thinking about the eerie whistle of arrow fletching that accompanied a masterful hit made the hair on the back of his neck stand up with excitement.  

He'd missed the rush of adrenaline that accompanied his charge into the heart of a bandit camp, his weapon dispensing a quick death on every side.  He craved the sting of a flesh wound, reminded of his mortality only when his battle-fog overwhelmed his mind. 

It was in that moment that he felt alive; there was no trace of the muted monotony of normal life.   Sometimes, the bandit scum even managed to land a hit, and he savored the feeling of his frantically firing nerves.  

He was in that moment vulnerable and exposed to death.  That feeling was like a drug, one that he repeatedly consumed.  

There were still days when he felt a rush of emptiness, the ache of a life left unfulfilled.  It was in his best interest to quash those lingering emotions, he knew that. He'd left his former life behind, true, but nothing other than the hunt could erase the restlessness that he'd felt his entire life.  

The hunt revealed his truth. 

The hunt was the only thing that reminded him of his heartbeat, as steady and reliable as his weapon.  

His heartbeat was the only thing that had remained with him through the civil war, his imprisonment, and afterwards.  The pulsing steady tattoo of his heart, drumming on and on and on, was a reminder.  Nil took great comfort in the soft and sure promise of his heartbeat; death was inevitable, and someday it would come for him. 

When the only enemy left to be felled was death itself, he would let the darkness flood over him; the setting of his final sun.  Until then, he would follow every last piece of scum to the ends of the land and deliver justice. 

_Perhaps not every last piece._

The Eclipse belonged to Aloy, which saddened him somewhat.  It was a mark of how much he respected her; he wouldn't interfere with her task. 

But, Helis might have been the greatest kill of his life.   _What a triumph that would be_ , he thought wistfully.   _The light fading from his eyes...it would be breathtaking._

Nil knew that he would help Aloy without hesitation if she asked, but otherwise, he would respectfully keep his distance.   _Courtesy and honor.  Sworn under the light of the sun and consecrated with blood and earth, never to be forsaken._

Courtesy and honor were set above all else, that was his dogma.  He supposed that he could be considered insane, but two years of deep contemplation at Sunstone Rock had only served to sharpen his mind and give him purpose. 

What good was honesty and bravery if it was wasted in service to those who scarred the earth by breathing?  No, he may have served the mad Sun King, but he was no slave to the demons that plagued the minds of lesser men.  

He ignored the wind that whipped around him; the cold sting didn't bother him.  He gazed to the east, watching silently as the sun began to rise, filling the desert sky with the brilliant colors of dawn.  

Pain brought clarity.  Pleasure ignited the song in his blood.  There was very little to be learned trying to prize the two apart, life was given meaning when he danced between the two halves of a whole. 

Idly, he wondered if the Ancient Ones would have been spared their fate had they known of this holy dichotomy. 

He didn't understand those who were determined to keep the two separate.  It was a waste of energy that could be better spent.  He could attempt to teach, but he suspected that his wisdom was more likely to fall on deaf ears than it was to be absorbed.  It was for this reason that Aloy was a constant source of interest for him; her blatant disregard for his philosophy pierced through the apathy of his existence and made something in him  _want_  to prove her wrong. 

The alien feeling wasn't entirely unpleasant.  Oh, he had experienced want before, but not like this.  

Nil was many things, but never a man who forced his will upon others. The subtle hunt that consumed his nights would take time, and he savored the rush that accompanied his every thought of the flame-haired Nora.  _She'll come to me of her own volition, of that I'm sure._

He knew that it was a matter of time before they saw each other again; the excitement in her blood was a mirror of his own.  The call of the hunt thrummed through both of their veins.

He suspected that she had glimpsed it when she'd kissed him.   She would fight against it until she drew her last breath, but he'd shaken her composure.  He'd seen a flash of desire in her eyes that eclipsed her love for control.  That was all he needed; she had opened a door that couldn't latch shut.  

In time, he knew, she would see him for what he really was. 

Enlightened.  

There was a small part of him that waited in hopeful anticipation for the moment that she accepted their truth.  If she was already a wonder, he was anxious to see just how far she could surpass him.  

He took another breath, tasting the smoke on the wind.  He didn't make a habit of standing in open fields, but he craved the rush of adrenaline that came with the constant footfalls of great machines around him.  He was in thunderjaw territory, and the great beasts paced all around him.  What may have been considered suicide by most simply put a bounce in his step.

Nil preferred not to hunt machines, but he appreciated their power nonetheless.  He was fond of thunderjaws; they reminded him of a certain huntress.  

He began his treacherous climb down into the valley, his eyes peeled for the sun-bright hair of his hunting partner.  

* * *

 

Aloy pulled an arrow out of a scraggly tree, grimacing at the nicks that marred the once sharp edge of her metal arrowhead.  She hated glinthawks with a fiery passion; they were hard to kill and always made her waste arrows.  Tsking quietly, she stuck her tongue between her teeth as she inspected the glittering metal shard.  

_I don't have an endless supply of shards.  Either I keep going or go back to Meridian to restock._

She pulled out a small whetstone and crouched down, attempting to smooth out the edge.  She only managed to nick her palm, cursing quietly as she watched a bright bead of blood well out of her skin.  The slip bothered her; she was so used to the sharp edges of her arrows that her lapse in concentration caused her some concern. 

The blood made her think of Nil. 

Hurriedly, she wiped the blood away and strode back to her mount.  She was determined to think of other things besides sun-kissed skin and a pressure between her legs that refused to go away.  It had been a month since her last bandit camp raid, and she was both restless and disappointed that she hadn't taken care of another one.   _Is it a craving for the hunt or because I haven't seen him?_

Part of her wanted to see Nil, to assure herself that the heat that had flooded through her veins was the result of exhaustion and stress.  The other part wanted to kill him on sight, ridding herself and the people of the Carja lands of an unstable murderer.  

_But what would that make me?_

Taking a steadying breath, she made up her mind.  Avad had mentioned something about a bandit camp nestled between two mountains that was causing some trouble.  She needed a distraction, badly. 

_"I already ask too much of you, Aloy.  But I know that I can count on you.  Will you help me?"  Avad had said quietly, a permanent worry line etched between his brows. "The peace is already strained; the bandits are only making it harder to keep my alliances strong."_

_Ersa's death is still too fresh; otherwise he would have sent some of the Oseram allies to check it out._ She thought, still mulling over her best course of action.  _I could just keep my promise or take care of it so that Avad doesn’t have to._

Despite her better judgement, Aloy had agreed to scout the area.  She'd kept her mouth shut about Nil; the last thing that she wanted was to invite questions about the mysterious silver-eyed stranger.  Even though Avad might have been able to tell her who Nil really was, she felt like that would be a betrayal.  She didn't have to like Nil, but she respected his ability to fight.  

Even she would pause before attempting to kill him.  Now even more so, as she felt her heart skip a beat and heat bloom in her veins as her mind wandered back to the way that his mouth had felt against hers. 

She'd always heard from Rost that kissing was likely to cloud her judgement and muddle her senses, but she didn't agree.  It was almost as if her mind had shifted into overdrive, becoming hyper aware of her body and the bruising softness of Nil's touch.  Everything was so crystal clear in that moment that she'd jumped away and forced her mind back to reality, muddying her real feelings on the matter. 

She still didn't know what those feelings were.    Pain and pleasure may be one force that drove Nil to do the things that he did, but she knew that she respected them as two very different things.  Pain made her fight for her life, igniting something primal and ancient inside her that screamed at her to  _live_.  That was what made her brain foggy, affected her ability to think clearly.

She still wasn't sure how to describe pleasure...that was something that she still didn't know much about.  

She clenched her jaw at the memories that threatened to wash over her, trying to clear her head of distracting thoughts.  

_"A huntress takes what she wants, Aloy."_

Even the memory of Nil's lips forming her name made her want to take off running, to ease the spike of adrenaline and need that coursed through her body.  She wanted to-

_Ugh!  I don't have time for this!_

What _did_  she want, exactly?  Not a bed partner, that much was clear to her. 

Rost had certainly never mentioned that bedding anyone was anything more than an action to make children.  She was glad that he hadn't given her many details, but no one had prepared her for the ignition of something that she could only describe as a  _wanting_. 

A wanting for what, she wasn't exactly sure, but it made her uncomfortable to know that her body was overriding her attempts to control it.  

The sun began to set, and she knew that her decision was made as the blood-red of the sunset streaked across the sky.  Tonight, she would take care of the bandits. 

_There will be one less burr in my blanket if I take care of them today._

Tossing her braids over her shoulder, she set out into the valley.  Her pulse began to pound as she felt a trickle of nervous anticipation seep through her veins.  Tonight, she might see Nil.  He always knew when she was staking out a bandit camp, it was almost as if he felt a silent call.   It was like they were connected somehow.  

Tonight, she was going to ignore him.  

* * *

 She reached the fortress far later than she'd intended to.  There were several longleg and ravager sites between her and the camp that she'd had to eliminate; she was annoyed by the number of arrows she'd had to use.  _Damn those blasted echo sensors_ , she thought angrily.  

The sky was dark, only lit up by distant stars.  Rounding the large rocks on the top of the valley cliff, she rolled her eyes when she saw that the bandits had a brightly-lit camp.  _It only makes them easier to hit._

Wasting no time, she rappelled down to the ground, holding her breath.  She hadn't been spotted; she released it with relief.  

Hidden in a patch of tall grass, she tapped her focus.  The sightline shot out around her, illuminating her opponents.  Her stomach gave a little lurch as she spotted a bright blue figure laying waste to the bandit numbers on the western side of the camp.   _Nil._

_How does he always know when I'm here?!_

Determined to keep her cool, she began to inch closer to the walls, laying traps as she closed in on the camp.  It took all of her willpower not to check her focus to keep track of Nil's progress.  She was briefly spotted by a sniper, and she darted back to the safety of her hiding place. 

"She went thataway,"  she murmured quietly as she watched two brute fighters hunting for her. "Nothing to see here."

They eventually gave up, and she readied herself for her assault.  

Taking a deep breath, she hurled a small rock into the fortress, catching the attention of several of the same bandit sluggers.  They charged into the night, seeking the intruder.  Faintly, as adrenaline began to flood through her veins, she knew that Nil would know that she was there when the traps went off.  

She flinched reflexively as several of her traps ignited at once, sending a concussion blast through the air.  Her ears were ringing, and she took a moment to gather her senses.  _I was too close to that one._

The blue figure was moving towards her now, inviting the attentions of seven yellow figures.  Making a decision, she darted into the fortress.  

The fight had begun.  She whirled and dodged, using her new tripcaster to its fullest potential as she fought.  Dimly, as the ringing in her ears from the explosions stopped, she saw that she had no more bandits to fight.  Breathing hard, she activated her focus and tagged the remaining fighters.  They were mostly crowded around Nil’s blue signature.

She jogged over to where he was fighting, intent on picking off the snipers before they saw her.  _They’ll be too distracted by Nil._

Aloy stopped in her tracks, taking a second to watch Nil fight.  It was like a dance, the way that he moved.  Sinuous and lethal, he didn’t even need to expend much effort to kill his attackers.  She found herself growing slightly envious of the way that he seemed to predict the attacks and was able to counter them easily.    _Is that how the Carja train their soldiers, or is that just him?_

She caught a flicker of movement out of the corner of her eye.

Her stomach dropped, a shiver of horror flooding through her as she saw the bandit.  He was behind Nil, running full-tilt at the Carja warrior.  A battleaxe glinted in the moonlight, and she felt her body moving of its own accord.  Nil was about to die.

_No!_

Time seemed to slow as she concentrated, bringing her bow up to her cheek.  The bandit never saw her coming, she was hidden in a patch of grass.  

There was nothing but the tightening of her bowstring, a slow, lethal sound.  She loosed the arrow, letting her breath out in a calculated burst as the arrow whistled through the air.  The bandit dropped, his battleaxe still held tightly in his fist.  The arrow had taken him right between the shoulder blades.  

Time began anew, and she fought back a shudder of revulsion as the bandit heaved his last dying breath.  A mournful sigh escaped his lips as the air hissed out of his open mouth.  It felt like an eternity before Nil turned, catching sight of her standing there, her bow still held at the ready.  

Nil sheathed his knife, an unreadable look in his eye.  

"You robbed me of my kill," he said quietly, his tone colored with surprise.  "Why did you interfere?"

She was about to make an angry retort when she caught sight of his expression.  A smile played around the corners of his mouth and his eyes were dark, filled with a smoldering heat that made her heart skip a beat. 

Her reply died in her throat and she suddenly remembered that she was supposed to be ignoring him.  She pivoted, turning her back to him and darting away.  She knew that he had followed her; there was something like electricity in the air when they were together.  It hung between them, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife.  

It still pissed her off; she couldn't afford to be distracted by the enigmatic warrior.  

The bandits were a welcome distraction.  (Aloy was faintly annoyed that it always seemed to rain when she attacked a bandit camp; the water made it difficult to aim properly.)  These bandits were clearly former soldiers; they attacked in pairs, fighting in formation.  They would attack, then parry, then circle around her.  She just needed to catch them at their most vulnerable; that was when they were switching attacking forms.  

They were an appropriate substitution for the Eclipse; Aloy’s frustration made her hit harder, faster.  

Her heartbeat thundered in her ears as adrenaline coursed through her veins and propelled her body forwards.  She focused on her footwork, dodging and whirling exactly how Rost had taught her.  Her muscles were flexing, contracting, driving her spear into the bandit on her left, and whipping her bow from her back to eliminate the one closing in from the right. 

_Again. Duck, then parry.  Thrust, then strafe backwards._

She lost track of Nil, the push and pull of the battle propelling her most primal instincts to life.  Aloy took a few precious seconds to survey the fortress, there were only a few bandits left, they were clustered around Nil. 

She was out in the open for too long.

She snarled in pain as an arrow nicked her, releasing a bright spray of scarlet blood as it whistled past.  Pain bloomed through her arm, sending her instincts into overdrive.  She drew back her bow, hitting the sniper between the eyes without even thinking.  

The immediate danger had now passed, and her body shifted from aggression to self-preservation; she was bleeding badly.  The arrow had been of the thick-tipped variety, engineered to take down ravagers and behemoths.  The sniper had meant business.  

Clutching her arm, she darted into a dark alcove and hurriedly gnawed on a piece of salvebrush.  She sighed in relief as the pain ebbed away; she couldn't fight properly when pain clouded her thoughts.  

She sat for a moment, assessing the wound.  She tapped her focus, watching silently as Nil, a bright beacon of blue, dispatched the many yellow-lit bandits with cold efficiency.  He reminded her of a stalker, all lithe strength and lazy confidence.  He was inviting their advances, taunting them into attacking. 

Aloy hurriedly bandaged the cut, muttering under her breath.  It was more severe than she’d originally thought; she went through three bandages before the blood began to clot.

Suddenly, it was quiet.  The fight was over. 

Aloy felt her heartbeat accelerate again as she watched Nil’s focus-lit figure stride towards her.   She turned her back to him as he came around the corner, downing an antiseptic tincture that she’d pulled from her pack.

“You’re injured.” He murmured, wiping droplets of blood from his face and his knife. 

“I’m fine.”

“Pain doesn’t drive you, Aloy.  It must be a deep cut.”

“No, it doesn’t.”  She snapped, bending over to rifle through the pockets of a fallen bandit.  “I’m fine.”

 “Are you?  It’s not like you to ignore me, Aloy.  I should be offended.”

She stood, annoyed that she’d only found a piece of slagshine glass.  The flickering light from the torches suddenly seemed too bright.  She froze as she saw his shadow on the stone in front of her, moving closer. 

“As I said before, Nil, we’re not friends.”  She hated that her voice trembled slightly. 

He chuckled.  “No, I suppose we aren’t.”

Time seemed to slow down again.  

Aloy could sense his body heat behind her, and she struggled to maintain her concentration.  She felt him move, but she was still shocked by his hand reaching out and brushing her hair off of her neck.  Her jaw clenched, and she felt a bolt of warmth shoot through her as his fingers grazed her skin.  Her breath left her in a soft puff; her heartbeat accelerated.  

"Aloy, I've been mulling over our last conversation."  He said softly. "It was...diverting." 

"I haven't thought about it."

"I don't believe you." 

_He's just trying to get a reaction out of me-_

She wasn't prepared for the feel of his muscular arm snaking around her waist and drawing her back against him.  The sensation of being pressed against his body was enough to make the heat in her belly ignite.  She felt hot and cold at the same time, but it wasn't unpleasant. 

Aloy gasped, the sound colored by indignation and a warning.  "Nil,  _what_  do you think-" 

"I'm asking a question.  Listen and you'll hear it." 

She was frustrated with the fact that her body responded to him.  She hastily threw a hand out, leaning against the stone for support.  

He moved even closer, the lithe strength of his body against hers made her feel weak. He didn't say anything, didn't need to.  There wasn't an inch of space between their bodies and she finally managed to dredge up enough rational thought to tell him off.  

But she couldn't bring herself to utter the words. 

"Push me away if you don't want this," He murmured, the timbre of his voice sending shivers down her spine.  She found that she couldn't concentrate as his lips brushed along the sensitive skin on her neck.  Heat flooded through her body again and she felt her resolve weakening.  

"You can kill me if you like, injure me, leave me and run into the night," he continued, his lips were barely a millimeter from her skin; she could feel him trace out every word.  "Or you can let me show you something other than pain.  It's your choice."

She didn't push him away; she found that she didn't want him to stop.  _What are you doing, Aloy?!_

 _Just once._ She thought.  _Then I'll be fine, I won't want him anymore._

She felt a tiny puff of air leave her lips as he gently raked his teeth along the junction between her neck and her shoulder.  Unconsciously, she arched back into his touch.  She didn't have it in her to fight against the wave of arousal that threatened to drown her.  His quiet intake of breath told her that he wasn't expecting her to respond to his advances.  

But it wasn't enough.  

_"If you want to bed me, all you have to do is ask."_

"Aloy,"  He almost purred, his breath ghosting along the shell of her ear. "What's your answer?"  

Aloy didn't want to speak, didn't care to explain herself.  She reached up and tangled her hand into his hair.  His eyes widened, almost imperceptibly, but he didn't back down from the clear challenge in her eyes.   He almost seemed surprised that she didn't attack him.  She didn't know what disconcerted her more, the fact that he desired her, or that she desired him back.  

"Aloy-"

"Don't misunderstand me-"  She cut off with a shiver as he tightened his arm around her waist, "-this doesn't mean that I like you.  I'm consenting because I'm curious, that's it." 

His quiet chuckle sent a shiver running along her spine.  His voice rumbled through her body, further stoking the fire that blazed within her.   "You don't have to like me." 

It was all that she could do to remember how to speak as his warm fingers suddenly made contact with the skin of her waist.  She hadn't noticed his nimble hand sliding beneath her shirt, underneath her armor.  

"G-good. Because I don't-" She forgot what she was about to say as she registered the rapid beating of his heart.  Her hand reflexively tightened on his hair and he tensed. 

She immediately let go, suddenly very unsure and self-conscious of her inexperience.  She let out a shaky sigh as Nil's right hand came to rest on the stone beside hers.   

His fingers slowly traced patterns across the back of her hand, his feather-light touch was almost too intense against her flushed skin.  She bit her lip to hold in another gasp as his fingertips trailed along the inside of her wrist and down her inner arm, making her shudder. 

His fingers grazed her blood soaked bandage, and to her surprise, it didn’t hurt.   It didn't tickle either, but it felt too good for her to ask him to stop.  She was baffled; this was something entirely foreign to her.  

"Nil-"

She cut off as his warm lips marked along the back of her neck. Somehow, he'd found a spot that made her breath hitch and her knees threaten to give out.  Her hand slid out of his hair to hook around the back of his neck, and in doing so, she accidentally grazed his skin with her short nails.  

He made a soft sound that was somewhere between a groan and a sigh. It rumbled through his chest and into her body, that's when she knew that they were past the point of no return.  She felt goosebumps erupt along her arms, the slight movement of his hips against her back made her lose track of her thoughts.  His left hand gripped her hipbone for a moment, and she tensed.  

_What is-_

Before she could react, he spun her around and pressed her hard into the stone wall.  He paused just long enough for her to see the smoldering look in his silvery eyes before he slid his hands into her hair and kissed her.  He took his time, slowly wearing down any lingering hesitation that she felt.  She felt like she couldn't breathe, didn't want to breathe.  

The way that he slanted his mouth over hers made her feel like her heart was going to beat out of her chest.  This was  _Nil_ , he wasn't soft, or tender, or kind.  But he touched her carefully, reverently, and she felt her body responding to his touch like she was dying of thirst and he was a cold mountain spring.  

It was frightening, the way that he seemed to know exactly what would make her react.  She felt dizzy as he alternated between slow, languid kisses and frantic, hungry caresses, throwing her off balance. 

Aloy allowed herself to relax, letting him pull her closer and pin her hands above her head.  She nipped his lip, impatiently pressing her body closer to his.  If she was going to relieve the pressure between her thighs, she was going to do it as efficiently as she could.  It was building to the point where it was almost painful; she needed something  _now_. 

It was exhilarating, knowing that she could break free if she chose to.  The power between them rested on her shoulders, and that was enough to make her heart pound. 

She couldn't believe that it was Nil who made her feel like this.  Powerful,  _wanted_. 

No longer like an Outcast, just as a woman.  He  _wanted_  her; he didn't give a scrapper's purr that she was motherless.  

It should have frightened her, knowing that he had claimed a small partof her.  But she didn't feel any fear.  

Clarity.  That was what she felt.  

Everything became so crystal clear that it was almost painful.  The way that his lips moved so easily with hers, and the desperate breaths that they took together filled her with desire. He groaned softly as she drew his lip between her teeth.  

 _So this is what power over another person feels like_.  Aloy thought she understood Nil for a moment, the push and pull of pleasure and pain, two halves of a whole. He resided in the junction between her frustration and curiosity.  

Her thoughts came to an abrupt halt as his mouth dropped to her neck.  There was something so vulnerable about his teeth grazing her pulse point, but it just made her feel  _alive_.  She wrenched her hands out of his and reached down to grip his shoulders, running her hands over his heated skin as he coaxed small sighs out of her.   This was supposed to be something to satisfy her curiosity, nothing more.  

But it felt like more.  The triumph after the hunt, the feeling of cool water on a sunburn, the sun breaking through the clouds.  It all felt the same.  It felt like  _this._  

She clumsily pushed his vest off his shoulders, helping him to unlace her chest-plate.  It fell to the ground with a clatter, and Aloy was so focused on Nil that she didn't even stop to check if she'd dented the metal.  

She gasped into his mouth as he suddenly lifted her and hooked her legs up around his hips.  Aloy couldn't think, couldn't even form a coherent thought as the new angle allowed him to press her harder against the stone.  The position of her hips against his felt so natural, so instinctive that she wasn't afraid this time when he slowly ground his hips against hers.  

Her bright eyes shot open, and she was entranced by the look in Nil's eyes as he deliberately repeated the motion.  Something compelling had flashed through his expression, akin to triumph tempered with heat.  Her body responded, her thighs tightening around his hips.  She heard herself make a strange sound, strangled, as if in pain.

She didn't have time to be alarmed at the sound, as a wave of something new and  _good_  shot through her.  _This_ was what she needed to relieve the pressure between her legs.  She fumbled with the ties of his pants, determined to remove all of the barriers between them.  Instinct drove her, and for once she didn't fight it.  Nil's hands slid down her waist, pulling her closer. 

She pushed her hips insistently against his, the friction between them was almost enough to-

Suddenly she was cold.  And thudding the ground. As if from far away, she heard Nil chuckle softly.  She watched, unable to think coherently as he drew his thumb slowly, teasingly across his reddened lips. 

_What..?_

She stared at him, completely discombobulated as he stepped further away from her.  Her mouth dropped open in shock as he began to saunter away, a smirk plastered firmly on his lips.  "You’re bleeding again.”

She was going to _kill_ him.  She wanted to run after him and punch him.  Her chest was still heaving with frantic breaths, and she noticed dimly that she was still plastered to the wall.  

Hurriedly, she scrambled to her feet and turned her back to him, shakily pushing her hair out of her face.  She only glanced behind her for a second, but she glimpsed a flash of teeth as he turned to survey her from a distance.  

"Goodbye, Aloy.  I'm intrigued by your answer."  He said smoothly, before he turned abruptly and disappeared into the night.  

She was the prey, and Nil had just taken his victory.  

Goddess help her, she was going to drive an arrow into his heart the next time that she saw him.  


	3. Third Warning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mesa beckons. Nil always knows when to strike.

 

Aloy stood frozen, completely shocked by Nil's request.  The wind swirling around the mesa blew her hair wildly around her shoulders, and she fought back the urge to shiver from the cold.  The bright sunlight glinted off of Nil's offered knife, forcing her to squint.  The sun was just beginning to set, and she found herself growing angry at the colors that stretched across the sky.  

Aloy clenched her jaw; their idyllic surroundings were ill matched with the storm of confusion and anger that raged inside of her.

_W-what?_

She couldn't hear anything around her; she could only focus on him.   She couldn't hear the clicking and huffing of grazing striders, she couldn't see the light glinting off of the snapmaws as they lazily swam around the lagoons.  She could only see Nil.

It was bittersweet.  They weren't surrounded by smoke and blood, and yet, they were in conflict.  Despite herself, she felt a flash of hurt.  Did Nil think that she was only as good as a deathbringer, raining destruction at every turn? 

She  couldn't possibly allow herself to take this dark path.  She couldn't, could she? 

"I won't kill you, Nil."  She finally found her voice and managed to blurt out the words.  Something strange flitted across his expression, his heated gaze filling her with a mixture of want and revulsion.  "I won't do it."

"Aloy-."

"No!"  She nearly shouted, drawing her bow off of her shoulder and letting it fall to the ground with a clatter.  "Don't ask me again.  All of this bloodshed, destroying the bandit camps, it was supposed to stop the killing."

"The killing will never end, you just have to shift your focus to see it. As you said yourself, there's little that separates me from the bandits that you so eagerly killed. Why aren't you aching to drive your spear through my heart?"

"I'm not a blood-thirsty hunter,"  she insisted, a flush settling over her fair skin.  "You're better than that, or you should try to be!"

"Oh Aloy, you don't really believe that,"  he entreated, taking a step towards her.  She bristled at his patronizing tone.  She stood her ground, her eyes never leaving the glittering metal of his blade.  "Why don't you understand that we're made of the same mettle?  Together, we got rid of the bandit scum.  The threat of our retribution has driven them away, is that ever going to be enough for you?"

"Stop, Nil.  I can't be the person that you want me to be." 

"You already are, Aloy.  That's why I asked you here."

"Why couldn't you just disappear?"  She whispered, her eyes watching him sadly as he moved towards her, lithe and graceful as a stalker.  "Why are you putting me in this position?"

"The mesa is the perfect place,"  he gestured at the landscape around them.  "The best arena for our final confrontation, the dramatic conclusion to our epic story.  Haven't I driven you to  _want_  to kill me?" 

"It's a waste of your life.  I need your help in the war that's coming."  She whispered, her gaze fixed on his mouth as he edged closer.  "I need someone like you."

"You don't need me,"  he chuckled softly, tilting his head to look at her.  She was reminded of an owl, the way that his eyes surveyed her was unnerving. "You're more than capable.  That's why I want it to be you."

"No."

"It can only be you."

"No!  I answered your useless pleasure question, I let you hunt with me, and now you want me to kill you?!"

"Yes.  You did hunt with me, you did let me hunt you, but now I'm ready to die by your hand.  That is what I want."

"Why can't you talk like a normal person?!   _I need you_ , you're the one who'll do whatever it takes to win!  I need your help!"  She pleaded, drawing herself up to her full height.  He was now so close that she felt his breath ghost across her forehead.  She tilted her head back to stare at him defiantly, daring him to try to change her mind.  Her heart was hammering, her pulse echoed in her ears.  

_I wanted to kill him, so why can't I, now that he's begging me to?_

"You're the only person who I would let drive a knife into my heart,"  Nil murmured softly, his tone deepening.  "It would be an honor to die by your hand."

"It would be a greater honor to fight with me, Nil.  You would be on the right side of the war this time,"  She whispered, her stomach flipping nervously from his proximity. "I'm tired of fighting this."

"There's no right side in a war,"  he said firmly, his expression unreadable.  She knew that he was wavering, the muscle clenching in his jaw was the only outward sign of his frustration.  

"There is life, and there is death.  You taught me to see that there is value in both sides,"  she continued, her nails digging into her palms.  "If you fight with me, you'll kill so that the people of this land can  _live_."

Something new flickered through his expression; she had never seen such vulnerability from him before.  She hesitated, her inhibitions screaming loudly at her to kill him, to run, to escape.  Ignoring them, she stepped closer.  Her forehead was level with his chin, and she reached up to place her hand on the skin above his heart.   

With her other hand, she took off her focus and gently tossed it to the side.  Now vulnerable, she raised her eyes to meet his.  

His pulse thundered through his body as quickly as hers did, and he sucked in a surprised breath as her fingers traced over his warm skin. She plucked up her courage, and hoping that she wasn't making a mistake, her hand reached for his, gently prying his fingers open. 

"I know what pain feels like.  You told me that you wanted to teach me something different.  If I kill you, I may never know what you were trying to show me."

She flinched at the clatter of his knife hitting the ground, and she opened her eyes again to see his silvery eyes were fixed on her.  Heat smoldered between them, and she didn't know who moved first.   Her hands tangled in the fabric of his vest the same moment that he snaked his arm around her waist and yanked her against his body.  

Nil's hand fisted firmly in her hair, and she gasped at the sudden sting.  She caught a glimpse of his eyes, dark with a molten heat that ignited the desire in her belly.  He hesitated for a split second, doubt flitting across his heated expression.  

"Aloy, do you want this?"  He murmured, his tone thick with desire. 

"Yes,"  she said, frightened by how meek she sounded.  She cleared her throat hastily and repeated herself, aching for him to press his lips to hers.  "Yes, I want you." 

"Aloy-"

"Stop talking, no more mind games."  She could barely speak the words, unable to catch her breath as Nil's warm hands burned up her sides.  She tugged at his headdress, tossing it to the ground.  "I don't care.  Just show me."

Heat blossomed between them as Aloy hopped up on her tiptoes and dragged Nil's mouth down to meet hers.  He let out a soft growl as their lips met that made her want to press harder into him.  So she did, relishing the sounds that rumbled through his chest and into her body as she nipped at his lip.  Without any warning, he lifted her and turned, laying her down on the prickly grass of the mesa.  She shivered as his teeth gently marked down the side of her neck, her hand reaching out to steady herself.    

Without realizing it, she'd wrapped her fingers around the handle of Nil's knife; it had been forgotten in the grass.  Instinctively, she rolled over, pinning Nil with her thighs.  His eyes widened slightly, then narrowed as he caught sight of the blade.  

"Are you going to kill me after all?"  He asked playfully, his tone low and dangerous.  The glint in his eye was hopeful, and she ignored him.  She had a different idea.  

She grinned, her expression feral.  "No, I thought I told you to stop talking."

He obeyed, watching her every move as she used the knife to cut away at the ties of her armor.  She started to shrug out of the metal casings, but his hand on her arm stopped her.  

"What?"  Her breathless exclamation sent a slow smirk across his mouth.  "I told you, no more games-"

"Don't rush, take your time." 

She froze, watching him intensely as his long fingers slowly, teasingly, began to remove the components.  She shuddered as his warm hands slid up her hips, tracing circles with his callused palms.  "Savor it, Aloy,"  he murmured, watching her with hooded eyes.  "It's like the hunt.  You need to taste the anticipation."

Aloy took a deep breath, slowing her movements.  He watched her silently as her fingers found the hem of her jerkin and eased it over her head.  His expression turned hungry, almost predatory as she slowly unwound the bindings on her chest.  She shivered in the early evening air as the cloth whispered away from her skin. 

"Now what?"  She said hoarsely; her question held the hint of a challenge.  His eyes darkened.  

Nil sat up suddenly, tracing his hands along her shoulders, her stomach, her back.  She almost groaned with frustration as he teased her, threading her hands into his thick hair.  Finally, just when she thought that she might burst from the tension, he dipped his head and pressed his warm lips to her neck.  She sighed, her breath coming faster as he gently drew her earlobe between his teeth.  

"Don't devour the moment,"  his warm breath puffed across the sensitive skin of her neck, making her shiver.  "Real pleasure isn't fast, it won't come if you rush it. Coax it out, use your heartbeat as a guide."

Her hands slowly eased down his neck, scratching lightly.  She felt a rush of satisfaction as he growled against her neck, the sound sending thrilling vibrations through her body.  He crushed her against him, his breath coming faster now.  She reflexively pressed her hips down, panting softly as his fingers tightened on her waist.  The groan that rumbled out of his mouth made her feel powerful, and she ground her hips against him, anxious to make him do it again.  

"Nil-" She cut off as the warm skin of his chest brushed against hers, intoxicated by the feel of him.  

"Listen, Aloy. Follow where it leads you,"  he said with difficulty, his teeth gritted as she moved against him.  

She could feel something building, a pressure between her thighs that made it impossible to think.  She chased after the elusive feeling, kissing Nil with an urgency that seemed too instinctive to be strange.  She almost came apart as the warmth of his mouth found her nipple, and she heard herself make a strangled sound.  

Nil smirked against her skin, repeating the action until she arched towards him, breathlessly demanding more.  As her mind finally managed to dredge up an ounce of rational thought, she focused her attentions on ridding him of the frustrating layers of clothing that still separated them.  He helped her, shrugging out of his vest and armor before pulling her down on top of him.  His heated mouth left marks on her skin as she explored the expanse of his chest.  

Still curious, she dragged her teeth down his neck and collarbones, basking in his soft sounds of approval.  His hands traveled slowly up her back, the feeling of his cool fingers running over her scars made her press back into his hands.  He drew back for a moment, his silvery eyes taking in every inch of her. 

His intense gaze made her suddenly shy, but before she could pull away, he rolled and pinned her beneath him.  She met his lips eagerly, softening the kiss as he hitched her leg over his hip.  His fingers brushed against the heat between her legs, and Aloy felt her hips move towards him, as if by instinct.  Any hesitation that she felt was gone, replaced only by her increasingly desperate need. 

"Have you learned enough?"  Nil suddenly asked, his eyes searching her face for signs of hesitation.  His voice was rough, and she realized that she liked to see him so close to losing control.  She felt like the huntress, not the prey this time.  She let her body relax, her last and final warning seeping away as she surrendered to her desire for him.  

She shook her head, guiding his hands to the ties on her leggings.  He didn't need any more encouragement, quickly unlacing the leather and slipping a hand inside.   Almost shyly, she shifted to help him, waiting in tense anticipation for him to touch her.  The feeling of his hand ghosting across her inner thigh made her hunger for more.  The tension was thick enough to suffocate them. 

The heat between her legs was growing more insistent, and she huffed with frustration.  He still hadn't touched her properly.  She grabbed his wrist, rolling her eyes at his hesitation.   _So it's true that partners have to be told what to do-_

She froze as he chuckled softly.  

"What?"  She demanded, fury winding its way into her expression.  She didn't know why it offended her that he'd laughed.  

His lips curled up in a self-satisfied smile.  His eyes locked onto hers, and she thought that she might drown in the silver of his irises.   His eyes narrowed, and he groaned quietly as she arched towards him.  "Patience, Aloy.  The hunt is nothing without the tension between you and your prey." 

"I don't want to be patient-"   She cut off as the slick pad of his thumb slowly circled around her small bundle of nerves.  Her hands scrabbled to hold on to something, anything as he gently eased one long finger inside her.  Aloy's nails dug into his shoulders as he slowly, deliberately moved against her.  

"Let go, Aloy.  Let your body do the work,"  he purred, his eyes still searching her face.  She squeezed her eyes shut in pleasure as a bolt of heat shot through her body, right down to her toes.  

_Oh._

He let out a soft "ah" of satisfaction as she shuddered against his hand.   Her muscles clenched rhythmically, and she was both confused and anxious to feel the way that he was able to play her body like an instrument.  Her thoughts cut off as she rode out another wave of heat, and she could barely focus on his reply.  

"It's intoxicating, isn't it.  Not being in control?"  He murmured, his mouth on her neck muffling his quiet question.  

"Nil-"

She was so swept up in the moment that she couldn't even string two words together to answer him as his hand steadily drove her upwards.  She was spiraling, up, up, up, breathlessly waiting for whatever was at the edge of the cliff that Nil patiently drew her towards.  Her body tensed, going taut as a bowstring as the tension in her muscles suddenly exploded, shooting pulses of white-hot pleasure through her.  She came down from her high gasping, gripping onto Nil's forearms like he was the only thing keeping her from falling back into nothing.  

He didn't say anything, just watched her as she regained her senses.  She saw a glimpse of herself in his silvery eyes and was transfixed by the wild creature who stared back with defiant green eyes.  As her breathing slowed, she found her fingers tracing along his cheekbones, his forehead, his lips.  He watched her as intently as she watched him, waiting for her to make her decision.  

"Nil."

"Hm?"

"What happens when the prey wants to be caught?"  Her voice trembled slightly; she was both terrified and fascinated by how much she wanted him.  His touch had done nothing to quench the fire that raged inside of her.  It was like he'd thrown a full can of blaze on it.  Her skin felt heated and over-sensitive, and still she needed  _more_.  

His eyes narrowed, and she tensed, suddenly wondering if she'd said the wrong thing.  

"You make the kill,"  he said simply.  

His head dipped down and he kissed her fiercely, pressing her into the ground as she surged up to meet him.  He tugged insistently at her leggings, and she quickly shimmied them down her legs, desperate for more.  

Her hands fumbled with the metal buckles on his pants, and he hurriedly moved to help her.  His mouth never left hers as he finished disrobing, as desperate for her touch as she was for his.  Her arms snaked around his neck, and he deepened the kiss.  She felt dizzy, completely absorbed in the feel of his warm skin against hers, his scent of heat and warm metal.

This was Nil. He wasn't warm, or kind, or soft, but he made her feel like she was precious.  Worthy of his reverence.

"You never forget your first hunt,"  he said softly, the next sound that ripped from his lips was almost a moan as she pulled him closer and angled her hips towards him.  "I'm not interested in forcing you-"

"Yes, Nil."  Her sharp reply was softened by the look in her eyes.  She hoped fervently that her expression conveyed everything that she was trying to say.  Ruled by instinct, she rolled her hips closer to him, giving him permission to keep going.  "You said that a huntress takes, so _let_ me." 

He paused, his calloused hand sliding beneath her hip.  She shifted, this time not afraid as she felt the length of his arousal pressing against her.  She nodded breathlessly at his wordless question.  _Yes._

Her eyes locked onto his as he shifted closer than she thought was possible, his hips gently pushing forwards.  Her hand slid into his hair, and time seemed to slow. 

He was right.  Pleasure was like the hunt.  Her anticipation was as tight as her bowstring, the sound of the sinew tightening was replaced by her quiet moan as he entered her in one smooth stroke.  She was so ready for him that there was no resistance, something that her pleasure-fogged brain barely noticed. 

Her back arched sharply as he pressed inside of her, her grip on his hair tightening.  His hooded eyes searched her face, watching for any sign of pain.  She felt none, to her surprise.  The feeling of him was foreign, but that was quickly dispelled as he drew slowly out of her.  The small shudder that shot through his body bathed her in triumph.  

_He's affected too-oh!_

She felt another moan slip out of her lips as her legs wrapped around his hips.  Slowly, so slowly that she thought she might lose her mind, he began to move.  His pace was unhurried, but the deliberate rhythm of his hips soon had her gasping for breath.  She didn't fight the new sensations that swept through her body, focused only on the feel of his body against hers.  Her heart skipped a beat as he nipped gently at her lip.  

Instinctively, her hips rolled to meet him, and she caught his earlobe between her teeth as his mouth marked up her throat.  He moaned sharply, his thrusts coming faster as she urged him on.  She felt herself spiraling upwards again, her muscles tightening quickly as he drove her towards the edge once more. Her nails dug into his back as he suddenly shifted, angling his hips deeper.  

She could hear herself making desperate, strangled sounds, almost from far away.  One particularly deep thrust had her writhing underneath him and he hurriedly latched his hand onto her hip, stilling her movements.  "If you keep doing that, I'm not going to be able to last,"  he gasped, his eyes half-lidded with pleasure.  

"Teach me,"  she commanded, guiding his hand from her hip to her breast.  "Finish the hunt, Nil."  

She rolled her hips against his insistently, feeling more powerful than she ever had in her life as he shuddered again.  A moan ripped from his throat, the sound eliciting the same triumph that she felt when she hit her target.  

Finally, she understood.  The stuttering of a heartbeat, the heat of blood rushing desperately through the body, struggling to make sense of what was happening.  It was all the same thing.  

She felt a smile turning up the corners of her mouth, and she let out a breathless laugh.  

His eyes snapped open, surveying her with a mixture of desire and confusion.  She slid her hands into his hair, dragging his mouth down to hers as she whispered, "Finish, Nil."

He didn't need any more encouragement as he picked up the pace, his hips rolling smoothly into hers as her nails dug into his back.  His hand dipped between them to touch her, and she couldn't help crying out as her hips bucked towards him.  His soft groans grew more guttural as he started to lose control, and she whimpered as one particularly hard thrust sent her headlong over the edge of her orgasm.  Aloy surrendered to him, letting go of everything as she felt her world shatter into fragments of white-hot pleasure.  

The movement of his hips grew less measured as he neared his own climax.  She watched with glassy eyes as he shuddered, his muscles rippling against her skin as he let go.  He slumped against her, his heartbeat thundering along with hers.  Aloy listened as their pulses began to slow, marveling at the way that their bodies began to calm.  

"You were right,"  she finally murmured, still cradling Nil's head against her chest.  "They're the same thing."

He chuckled, raising himself up on his elbows as he took a good look at her.  "Finally, you understand." 

He rolled off of her, and she was suddenly cold.  Turning away from him, she began to dress, trying to make sense of the confusing swirl of emotions that rioted inside of her.  She tensed as his warm hands wound around her shoulders, pulling her back against his body.  

"Has your curiosity been satisfied?"  He asked, his quiet murmur sending a shiver down her spine.  

"Yes,"  she answered simply, leaning back against him for a moment. "Will you fight with me?"

He sighed, his breath ruffling her hair.  "What are the odds?"

"We're probably all going to die,"  she answered honestly, turning her head to look at him.  

He grinned wolfishly, all teeth and sharp edges.  "Then, yes.  I will fight with you.  In the meantime,"  his expression grew predatory once again.  "Do you want to try and kill each other?"

Aloy groaned, standing up as she shrugged into her leggings.  "No, Nil.  Meet me in Meridian in two weeks."  

"I'll claim victory tonight, Aloy.  You won't forget-"

"Your spear, I get it.  Stop talking,"  she muttered, turning away so that he couldn't see the bright blush that bloomed in her cheeks.  

Moving on slightly shaky legs (she'd rather die than admit to Nil that she felt wobbly because of him), she strode off into the quickly-darkening night.  She knelt to pick up her focus as she left, her armor threatening to fall off because of her stupid idea to cut the fastenings.  She groaned inwardly, only stopping when she was out of sight.  Aloy leaned against a boulder, still reeling.  

She reached into her pack, fighting down the confusing riot of emotions that still swirled in her belly.  She hesitated before chewing the herb that she'd chosen, nipping any chance of pregnancy in the bud.  _I may have bedded him, but he'll not receive the honor of a child from me_ , she thought harshly, forcing her feelings down deep.  Frustrated by her riot of emotions, she determinedly made her way towards the bright lights of Meridian. 

She wouldn't admit it, but she already craved his touch.  Next time would be different, she must stay in control.  

_There will be no heat._


	4. The Eve of the Battle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aloy accepts a truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Yes, hi, it's me, the (lying) author here. I know that I said that this story was only going to be four chapters, but it's going to be a hard six. If you aren't a fan of this couple or are uncomfortable with another installment that includes smut, then this chapter is not for you! As always, the comments and kudos are the validation chips that keep this creative machine running. I appreciate each and every one of you who is still with me thus far. So, without further ado, here's chapter four! xx

Aloy lay on her back, inspecting every inch of the carved stone roof of the bedroom she occupied.  Her heart thumped nervously in her chest as she toyed with Rost's necklace.  She fought the urge to pace; instead she rested her index and middle finger on her focus, activating the comforting blue sphere of influence.  

"Sylens?"  She murmured hesitantly, feeling slightly stupid.  "Are you listening?" 

There was no answer, and she rolled over onto her side, a bubble of annoyance blooming in her chest.  "Of course not, figures that he'd disappear when I actually want to talk to him." 

She waited for a moment, hoping silently that her furious statement would prompt an acerbic response from the enigmatic Banuk, but her focus remained silent. 

Her hand wandered back to her necklace, and she debated trying to talk to Rost.  She wasn't entirely sure that she believed in spirits, especially now that she'd spent so much time with the holograms of Elisabet Sobek and the alphas of Project Zero Dawn, but she knew in her bones that Rost would always be there to watch over her. 

Sighing deeply, she rolled onto her back and threw an arm over her eyes.  

_If he could see me now, he'd have a few choice words for me._ His stern face swam across her closed eyes, his brow furrowing with disapproval as his familiar voice echoed in her mind's eye.  

_“We don't kill for any reason other than self-defense, Aloy.”_

_“Stay away from the Ancient Ones; they carry powerful curses in the depths of their ruins.”_

_“Be careful who you hunt with, you will become like them.”_

_“We are Outcasts, it's the way that things are, we shouldn't try to fight against it.”_

Suddenly, she was struck with a second of panic; it was getting harder with each passing day to remember what he looked like and remember the exact sound of his voice.  She squeezed her eyes shut as hard as she could, trying to preserve every last shred of his memory. 

But it was like trying to hold smoke in her hands, and the details of his features quickly began to blur and fade away.  

For the first time in months, she didn't suppress her grief and hot tears spilled down her cheeks, running into her hair as she lay there on the straw pallet that Erend had thoughtfully left out for her.  Her body trembled with sobs as she allowed herself to feel all of the emotion that she'd worked so hard to ignore.  She hated that she'd killed so many, left the Embrace, and lost the only father that she'd ever known.  

She hated that the Nora girl that she knew was dead.  Her life had taken such a strange turn; she wasn’t the same person whose only goal was to win the Proving.

Her mind wandered to thoughts of Nil, and she bit down a flash of shame.  She hadn't seen him for weeks, but she couldn't scrub away the memory of his silver eyes and the feeling of his body against hers, no matter how hard she tried.  For a split second, she debated looking for him in Meridian.  

For once, she didn’t want to be alone.

He'd promised to help her fight the Eclipse, but she didn't know whether she believed that he would actually show up.  So far, he'd kept every promise that he'd ever made, but that was before they'd slept together and she was feeling more confused than ever.  There was a small part of her that hoped that he would break his word, and she wouldn't have to waste a shred of energy worrying about him-

She abruptly sat up; her heart hammered as she registered the thought that had just crossed her mind.  She planted her heels on the ground, suddenly feeling out of breath.   _I’m worrying about Nil?  What's happening to me?!  I'm hours away from the end of the world and I'm worried about whether he'll survive the fight?!_

She stood up, planting her hands on her hips and staring at her reflection in the rippling metal mirror on the wall opposite her.  When her swirling thoughts finally began to calm she sighed and slumped back down on the bed.  Aloy stared at her hands for a few moments, taking in her calluses and scars, and wondering if this was what her last night on earth was going to be like; full of anxiety and swirling emotions that she didn't understand.  

Her head snapped up as she heard a knock at the door.  Her heartbeat accelerated again, and she laid a cautious hand on her belt knife as she crept closer to the door.  Just as her hand was reaching out to open it, she nearly jumped out of her skin as a loud voice on the other side began to yell, shattering the silence.  

"Aloy, are you in there? I was coming to check on you-" Erend's thundering voice cut off as she flung the door open, a mocking smile sliding across her mouth.  

"You do know what time it is, right?"  She asked drily, turning and striding back into the room as Erend stepped inside and closed the door behind himself, his battleaxes clinking together.  It was like a strange kind of music, a tune that Aloy was now beginning to understand.  

Not unlike the sound of a bowstring tightening, the rush of blood, and the _thunk_ that accompanied a clean kill. 

"Sorry, I'm too keyed up for tomorrow," he replied sheepishly, running a giant hand through his close-cropped hair.  "Are you going to sleep at all tonight?" 

"Probably not," she said honestly, shrugging as she took in the dark circles under his eyes.  She knew that she probably looked just as tired, if not worse.  "Is Avad going to be ready?" 

"He won't need to be."  Erend's confident reply made her raise one eyebrow; she was silently impressed by his determined bravado.  "Ten of my best men will be guarding him."

She sighed, settling her knife back into its sheath as she relaxed.  "And you'll be in the vanguard, of course.  Can I count on you to fight with me if the Eclipse makes it to the Spire?" 

He scoffed, crossing his beefy arms and pursing his lips.  "You couldn't keep me away.  We Oseram-"

"Go where the fighting's thickest," she finished for him, a small laugh bubbling up from her chest as she shook her head. 

His smile faded away as he regarded her; he was always able to tell when she was troubled.  "We're going to win tomorrow.  We'll all die before we let them get to the Spire." 

"That's what I'm afraid of," she responded sadly, crossing her arms and surveying him with eyes older than her years. 

The silence stretched between them for a moment before he yawned and stretched, determinedly changing the subject.  "Get some sleep, Nora.  I'll see you on the battlefield, and we'll fight shoulder to shoulder until all of the bastards are finished."  

She forced a small smile as he smartly saluted and opened the door to leave.  "Goddess guide your arrows, Erend," she said finally, suddenly struck with the urge to give him a Nora blessing before he left.  

They both knew that he’d come to say goodbye, just in case. 

He nodded, his kind eyes silently thanking her as he stepped outside the threshold. She caught a glimpse of the violently raging storm outside before he gently closed the door behind himself.  She turned away, fighting down another wave of sorrow as she considered all of the friends that she had made over the course of the last year.   _They might all be dead tomorrow. Teb, Varl, Talanah, Erend, Avad, Vanasha, Petra, everyone might die._

_And Nil.  He'll be thrilled if this battle gets him killed._

She didn't even notice that the thought had crinkled the corners of her eyes with a sad smile. 

There was another knock at the door, and she strode towards it, a smirk already on her lips as she flung the door open.  "What did you forget-" 

She cut off as she took in the sight of the soaked figure in the doorway.  Nil's clothes were plastered to his skin, and the feathers on his headdress drooped from the weight of the water that streamed down from the eaves.  She stared at him for a moment, her mouth hanging open slightly in surprise.  

“Nil..?”

She couldn't find the will to protest as he raised his head and smirked, stepping over the threshold and entering the house.  She stepped backwards in time with his steps, barely able to stay a scant few inches ahead of him as he firmly closed the door behind himself.  He removed his headdress, peeling out of his armor before she could speak.  She just watched him for a moment, a million questions whirling through her mind as he casually removed most of his clothes.   He continued to stalk towards her, and she felt a spike of adrenaline course through her veins as her back hit the wall. 

It was all that she could do to attempt to think, all of her instincts just wanted to take in every inch of his tanned, toned body.  Her gaze raked down his chest and halfway down his stomach before she forced herself to focus and speak to him.  

Finally, she found her voice and managed to force a few words out of her mouth as her palms began to sweat and her heart threatened to beat right out of her chest.  "Nil, what are you doing here?" 

His eyes locked onto hers, and she could feel the thrum of anticipation permeate the air between them.  The corner of his mouth ticked up, and he regarded her with such frank intensity that she shivered. "I gave you my word, Aloy." 

"I-I know, but what are you doing  _here_?" She blurted, already knowing the answer to that question.  It was like her mind had shifted into another gear; all that she could focus on was him.  He stepped closer, and she found herself rooted to the spot as he towered over her.  

"It was a question of honor," he replied smoothly, hooking one finger underneath her jaw and gently raising her chin.  "You promised me insurmountable odds, and I promised you my blade.  Why do you think I'm here?" 

The look in his eyes was slightly mocking, and she felt her face scrunching into a frown as a flicker of irritation shot through her.  "You showed up at  _my_ door, I didn't come looking for you." 

"No, you didn't," he murmured, his breath ghosting over her lips as he moved even closer.  "I came looking for you." 

"Why?"  She whispered, her heartbeat hammering in her ears as all of her blood rushed into her belly at the playful tone of his voice.  She closed her eyes as his other hand slid slowly over her hip, sending a wave of goosebumps over her flushed skin at the contact.  “How did you know that I was here?”

"I wanted to," he said simply, drawing her closer.  “There’s only one red-haired Nora girl in Meridian.”

She brought her hands up against his chest, pushing firmly to keep him at bay. 

"Nil, what do you think-"

"Aloy, deny that you think about me," he interrupted, his silvery eyes darkening.  "Deny that you desire me as much as I desire you.  Go on, do it." 

“I can’t-“

“So don’t even try.  You said that you understood what I was trying to teach you.”

“I do-“ she cut off as a blush burned over her cheeks.  “But that doesn’t mean that you can just show up and try to bed me right before a battle!”

“There’s no better time,” he murmured, the timbre of his voice rumbling through her, intensifying the heat pooling in her body. 

“Yes, there is!” She let out a bitter laugh, finally raising her eyes to meet his.  “You can’t act like we’re a couple.”

“That’s not what I’m asking for,” he said softly; the quiet determination in his tone confused her even further.  

"What do you want me to say?"  She demanded, unable to tear her eyes away from his lips. 

"We're probably going to die tomorrow, I don't have time to waste arguing with you-" 

"Exactly, so stop denying what you want," he said, his voice low and intense as his hands slid up her hips and gripped her waist possessively.  "If I'm going to perish in a glorious battle, I would like my final sight to be the sun glinting off your spear.  Like I said, there’s only one red-haired Nora in Meridian, and only one Aloy." 

“What does that even mean?” Her frustration and confusion made her question more aggressive than she’d meant it to be. 

He sighed, clearly exasperated by how dense she was.  “I could be anywhere, but I chose to come here.  Take it as a compliment.”

She was struck speechless.  His eyes raked over her face, his expression a mixture between desperation and desire.  Without thinking, without waiting for her mind to start spinning, she reached up and brushed her thumb gently over his bottom lip. 

She didn’t want to be alone, not on the eve of what was potentially the last day of her life.  She wanted to feel a human connection, to be distracted from the pain of Rost’s absence and Sylen’s silence. 

He sucked in a surprised breath as she closed the distance between them, kissing him softly.  He hesitated for a second, just long enough for her to start to panic, but then he responded with gentleness that she hadn't expected.  

She drew back reluctantly, already conflicted as she took in the changing shade of his eyes.  They were darkening again, filling with a heat that she still didn't understand.  It affected her, the way that he looked at her like she was something priceless.  

"You came here because you wanted to," she whispered, marveling at the way that those words sounded as she spoke them. 

“Yes.”

“You’re happy about what’s coming tomorrow?  Our odds of surviving this are slim to none,” she continued breathlessly, fully aware of every inch of his body against hers. 

He laughed softly, a mocking sound.  "My odds of seducing you were far smaller.  Machines are easier to kill, although far less entertaining to hunt." 

She was about to retort when he ducked his head and kissed her.  He kissed her like a man who knew exactly what he wanted, with lazy confidence and quiet determination.  Aloy's whole body felt like it was humming with electricity as they clung to each other, unable to break away from their passionate embrace. 

She barely noticed when he swept her up, hooking her ankles around the small of his back as he took several hurried steps towards her makeshift bed.  She didn't protest as he laid her down, already tugging her shirt up over her head as he settled his body flush against hers.  

She surrendered to his embrace as he pressed hot, open-mouthed kisses along the column of her neck.  Her skin felt hot and cold at the same time as his hands purposefully slid along the curve of her waist, pulling her closer.  She impatiently shrugged out of her undershirt, her expression daring him to comment on how quickly she was undressing.  To her surprise, he didn’t offer any sarcastic remark; he simply drank in the sight of her.

She shied away after his smouldering eyes looked at her for a little too long, but he made a sound of impatience and raised his head to kiss her again, banishing any self-conscious thought from her mind as his tongue swept along her lower lip.

Aloy tangled her hands in his silky hair, pulling him closer.  Nil’s words echoed on her mind, giving her the courage to roll over, pinning him with her hips.  His eyes locked onto hers, sending another bolt of arousal straight through her.  She ignored her embarrassment as his gaze raked over every inch of her skin and leaned down to nip at his lip. 

He made a small sound of approval as she pressed her hips down against his, rolling them experimentally in a figure eight.  She bit her lip to hold in a moan as he arched up to meet her, his hands eagerly tracing along her back and pulling her closer as she attempted to shed her leggings and unlace his pants at the same time.  They struggled for a moment, and she almost let out a small laugh as he impatiently fought with the extra-tight knot on his pants.

Finally freeing the knot, he captured her lips in a feverish kiss as they both worked to rid each other of the last shreds of clothing that separated them.  Breaking the kiss for air, Aloy was suddenly struck with a tiny bit of hesitation, wondering if this was the right thing to do.

As if he could read her mind, Nil carded his hands through her hair and cradled her face.  “Aloy,” he breathed, and the way that he said her name was like a prayer.  “Don’t think.”

Her bright eyes rose to meet his intense gaze, and she nodded, acquiescing to his request as he kissed her softly, coaxing the fire that was flickering inside her back to a raging bonfire.  She pressed insistently against his lips as the pressure between her legs returned, spurring her onwards.

She gasped sharply as his hands grabbed the back of her thighs and yanked her hard against him, nipping gently at the skin between her breasts.  Aloy allowed herself to relax and only pay attention to how he made her feel as his right hand slowly, teasingly dipped between her legs.  Immediately, her inner thighs began to tremble and muscles deep inside her tensed as he stroked her softly. 

Memories of his touch returned as he moved his hand in slow circles, making her shudder. 

A wanton moan tore from her lips as he continued his ministrations, guiding her quickly towards the now-familiar edge of her orgasm.  She gripped his shoulders hard, feeling her body responding so enthusiastically to his touch that she was afraid that her nails would break the skin on his shoulders.  He didn’t seem to mind, however, and continued to circle his fingers against her with equal enthusiasm.

Unexpectedly, he lifted her up and flipped them over.  Aloy’s back hit the pallet with a thump, and she glared at him half-heartedly as she struggled to catch her breath.  She was about to tell him off for stopping when she paused; the look in his eye was wicked and sent a sharp bolt of heat straight to her core as he pressed deliberate kisses down the length of her flat stomach.  She stared up at the ceiling, suddenly feeling nervous as he ducked between her thighs.

Aloy felt his warm breath puffing against her inner thigh, and she nearly squirmed away.  She was trembling with nervous anticipation, unsure what he was going to do next.  She glanced down at him, and she found that she couldn’t look away from his direct, passionate gaze as he very deliberately dragged his tongue against the small bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs.

Shocked by the intensity of the sensation, Aloy’s back arched as he repeated the motion.  She was so caught up by the pleasure of what he was doing that she didn’t see the satisfied smirk that slid across his lips as she shuddered beneath him.  He very quickly figured out that she reacted strongest when his tongue moved in slow, maddening circles. 

Aloy’s eyes were squeezed so tightly shut that she missed the emotion that flickered across his silver eyes as she unconsciously moaned his name.  Her body suddenly went taut and then exploded with heat, sending bolts of white-hot pleasure through her.   The wave of her climax crashed over her, and she forgot everything.

Everything but him.

She gasped for breath as the aftershocks ebbed away, only registering the smug smirk on his mouth as he kissed his way back up to her lips.  She was suddenly impatient, unwilling to wait any longer.  She needed him to distract her, to make her feel something other than fear and pain. 

She grabbed his shoulders, tugging him closer and slipping her hand between them to guide him inside her.  With no hesitation, he obliged, steadying himself with an arm beside her head as her legs hooked up around his hips.

She felt her mouth opening in a silent gasp as he pressed inside her, watching him intently as his eyes turned half-lidded with pleasure.  He let out a quiet, involuntary groan as he began to move, rolling his hips smoothly into hers.  She gripped onto the sheets underneath her, her hips rising to meet him halfway as her eyes fluttered shut.

It was different this time, faster, and more intense.  Gone was any reluctance that she felt, it was replaced by a single-minded determination to wring every last shred of pleasure out of this encounter; they both knew that it could be their last. 

Their quick breathing and breathless moans filled the room, the temperature rising as a thin sheen of sweat bloomed over their bodies.  Nil was everywhere, his hands smoothing over her skin, coaxing sharp cries from her lips as he pressed deep inside her. 

She felt her body tensing, drawing her firmly towards the edge.  She couldn’t help the desperate whimper that left her lips as he kissed her hard, his tongue sweeping against hers.  Her reaction to his touch only spurred him on, and the force of his thrusts increased, causing her muscles to tremble violently as she spiraled higher. 

Far faster than she thought was possible, Aloy shattered for a second time.  Flashes of white light exploded across her closed eyelids as she felt the spreading warmth of her climax reaching into every inch of her body.  She sagged back down into the pallet, suddenly boneless as Nil caught her lips in a bruising kiss. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think as he rapidly tensed, his muscles shuddering and rippling as he came, gripping onto her hips with enough strength to leave a mark. 

They lay there for a moment, neither of them speaking as they came down from their respective highs.  Nil eased onto his side, rolling off of her, but instead of leaving, he simply surveyed her.

“What?”  She demanded breathlessly, her cheeks still flushed with exertion. 

“If we don’t die tomorrow, will you fight me on the mesa?”  He asked quietly, the hint of a mocking smile on his lips.  “It’s a shame that this battle got in the way of our epic conclusion.”

“I said that I didn’t want to kill you,” she retorted, groaning at his one-track mind.

“Only because you need me,” he purred, moving closer as a predatory half-smirk slid across his mouth. “After tomorrow the slate will be wiped clean.”

She made a sound of annoyance, like an angry cat, and turned away from him.  She sucked in a shocked breath as his arm snaked around her waist, pulling her against him.  His warm breath ghosted across the back of her neck, and she felt a shiver run along the length of her body as his chest came to rest against her back. 

“Aloy,” he murmured against her skin, his voice sending vibrations down her spine.  “Tell me to leave if you want me to.”

“Shut up, Nil,” she grumbled in response, grudgingly allowing herself to relax against him.  “I don’t want to fight you.”

“This is just another kind of fight, and a victor will always emerge,” he whispered cryptically in response, dragging his teeth over the top of her spine as she arched against him in response.  “Two sides of the same shard, remember?  Just as you are forged from sunlight, I was dredged up from the shadows.”

“Go to sleep, or leave,” she muttered, trying to fight against the urge to snuggle closer to him.  It was strange, to be so closely twined with another person, but not unpleasant.  Nil fell asleep faster than she did, his breathing evening out and lulling her towards sleep.  His arms tightened around her as he slept, it was weirdly comforting to be held this way. 

She still wasn’t sure if she liked it or not. 

_It doesn’t matter._

Finally, warm and safely wrapped in Nil’s arms, she fell into a deep, dreamless sleep. 

She woke up to the sound of war drums. 

Aloy darted to her feet, barely noticing that Nil was still deeply asleep.  She dressed quickly, strapping on all of her weapons and checking to make sure that all of her gear was in order.  Annoyed, she poked Nil with her boot, nearly jumping backwards in surprise as his eyes flew open and his gaze snapped onto her.

She felt something in her stomach do a backflip as he grinned sleepily at her, all teeth and feline grace as he stretched languidly, exposing the expanse of his deeply muscled torso.  Frowning, she determinedly punched down the small part of her that wanted to crawl back in bed and ignore the call to war.

She must have stared a little too long; of course, Nil noticed her gaze. 

“Are you going to pounce, Aloy?” He murmured suggestively, taking in her heavy armor, bristling with weapons and shining with the added support of power cells.

“It’s started,” she said shortly, turning on her heel and throwing the door open.  Her heart leapt into her throat as she tasted smoke on the wind, bitter and acrid with the scent of corrupted machines. 

“What are you waiting for?” He asked quietly, his voice suddenly coming from right beside her ear.  She started, and then glanced back at him.  She hadn’t even heard him shrug into his armor, but there he was, watching the columns of smoke on the horizon with a serious intensity that she’d never seen from him before. 

“Try not to die, Aloy.  I still have plans for you.”

Nil’s tone made a shiver roll down her spine.  She refused to look at him.

_Don’t get distracted!_

He brushed past her; breaking into a loping run that covered so much ground that he was out of her sightline within seconds. 

_Time to end this._

Aloy’s fingers itched to hold an Oseram cannon, to watch as deathbringers crumbled to the ground and the Eclipse was thwarted.   She wanted to meet the machines with equal force, to be worthy of Hades’ fear. 

She darted into the street, dodging falling debris as machines began to pelt the city with missiles.  She vaulted over a stone wall, her hair flying as she notched an arrow and aimed at the sawtooths advancing on the settlement below the city.  Her bowstring snapped across her cheek as she let it fly, not even pausing to see if she’d hit her mark as Carja soldiers swarmed the fallen beast. 

She was just about to run full-tilt towards the city gates, towards the source of the explosions, when one of Erend’s men stepped into her path.  “Aloy, you’ve got to get to the palace!”

“What’s happened?” 

Her words were drowned out by an explosion that rocked the city and sent her flying.  She coughed, forcing dust out of her eyes as she struggled to pull air back into her lungs. 

“Helis is here-” the Oseram warrior yelled, his voice hoarse from the dust.  “-he’s heading for Avad!”

“Damn it!”  She leapt to her feet and opened up her stride, her feet rapidly ate up the scant mile that separated her from her friend.  It was time for Helis to die.  She would _finally_ avenge Rost.

_It’s time to end this fight._

 


	5. Support

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle for Meridian begins.

Aloy picked up the Oseram cannon, comforted by the weight of the heavy iron gun.  Her hands warmed the metal, making the gun feel like it was an extension of her body as she took aim on a lumbering deathbringer, engaging the weapon's trigger.  Her whole body rocked backwards with the kickback, making her dig her heels into the ground as the gun shot deadly projectiles at the incoming machine.  

She felt more than heard the impact, grinning fiercely as she assessed how much damage she'd inflicted.  Two of the legs had been taken out completely, and she calmly reloaded and shot another round, darting up to a higher platform as quickly as she could with the cumbersome weapon.  One last shot took the deadly machine out completely, and she savored the rush of triumph that flooded through her veins as it crumpled to the ground, spraying sparks and streams of corruption.  

Before she could continue to celebrate, however, her keen eyes spotted a wave of smaller machines charging into the valley.  Her stomach dropped as she took in the packs of ravagers, flocks of longlegs, and legions of both fire and ice bellowbacks.  She called out the alarm, prompting several dozen Oseram fighters to rush down from the walls to help her.  

She spotted Petra in amongst the fighters; the Oseram threw her a cheeky wink and a smile before lifting up a cannon with ease and firing with no hesitation into the oncoming wave of enemies.  Aloy smiled back, pleased that she was able to muster enough soldiers to help, and continued to fight.  Machine after machine attacked their ranks, and machine after machine fell, littering the battleground with hunks of twisted metal and burning oil.  

Aloy couldn't taste anything other than smoke and the acrid smell of sparking metal.  She hurriedly wiped a hand over her face, taking a scant moment to breathe and regain her sense of the battle.  Bodies littered the ground amongst the machines, and she was struck with guilt over their passing.   _Any good commander would feel that, Aloy, they died for a cause that they believed in.  They wouldn't want me to waste time and energy mourning them until the battle was over._

The booming cannons and shrieking machines made a racket that was almost overwhelming.  She fought to concentrate, to isolate the next threat.  

Unbidden, her mind flashed to Nil.  

She forced her thoughts elsewhere, sucking in a sudden shocked breath as the largest missile blast she'd ever seen shot straight towards her.  She couldn't make her feet move fast enough as she ran for cover.  

The explosion was so powerful that she was thrown off her feet, shooting across the ground with the momentum and finally rolling to a stop under the great stone gate into the city.  She struggled to pull air into her lungs; the blast had winded her.  Her ears rung, the decibel level of the missile strike had knocked her senseless.  She tried to climb to her feet, but was stopped by a frantic yell from the remaining Oseram warriors.  

Suddenly worried, she glanced up, just in time to see the stone of the portal cracking, shattering with the force of another projectile.  The last thing that she saw was falling rock. 

Then everything went black. 

* * *

 

Nil grinned, his face lighting up in a cruel grimace.  If anyone had looked over at him, they would have been unnerved by the fact that his smile didn’t reach his eyes.  He took a moment to survey the battlefield around him, counting the machines that ravaged the city. 

 The sound of thundering cannons and machine gunfire echoed off the walls of the valley that cradled Meridian.  The noise was deafening, sending vibrations through the earth and causing small rockslides that added to the chaos and confusion of the battle.

Nil barely noticed the cacophony around him; machines were easy to kill.  Almost lazily, he vaulted off of a downed building and drove a random spear that he’d picked up into the eye socket of a corrupted watcher.  His heartbeat hammered in his ears, and he sighed with contentment as the machine crumpled, its corruption pouring out of the body like blood.

He didn’t like killing machines as much as he did humans; it wasn’t the same to see the life fade from a mechanical beast.  But the corruption, that awarded the machines an extra edge. 

He welcomed the challenge, nimbly skipping out of the way of a corrupted sawtooth.  Nil dropped his center of gravity as the giant mechanical cat exploded towards him, sliding along the ground as he aimed the point of the spear into the machine’s heart panel.  The sawtooth went down, thrashing and shrieking as it began to spark, its blaze canisters punctured. 

He stepped calmly around the pools of corruption that poured out onto the ground as he lazily thrust his spear into the machine, ending the threat.  Nil wiped his spear off and continued into the heart of the city.  He dodged missile strikes and falling debris, moving quickly and efficiently through the great battle.  He fought back the urge to yawn; he was bored. 

Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw something that intrigued him.  Scores of masked troops, wearing a strange symbol on roughly-hewn masks were making their way into Meridian, laying into the people running away in fright with spears and guns.

They looked just like the bandits in the camps, armed to the teeth and oozing with cruel intentions.  Nil felt a flicker of excitement wind through his veins as he edged closer, his heartbeat already increasing with anticipation.

_Finally, I can hunt.  Aloy would approve._

He drew his bow from his back, fitting an arrow into the string and bringing the weapon to his cheek.  He let out a soft sigh as the string drew back; the sound of sinew tightening was music to his ears.  He let out a sharp breath as he loosed the arrow, watching intently as it soared through the air.

The arrow flew straight towards his prey, the fletching whistling as it travelled over a long arc. 

He hit one of the attackers between the eyes, exhaling with satisfaction as the Eclipse soldier crumpled to the ground.   The group swivelled to face him, as if on cue, and he grinned savagely at them. 

 _Now this is going to be fun_. 

Nil couldn’t keep the cruel smile from his mouth as he darted into the remains of a burned-out building, circling around the attackers and shooting arrows at them from every angle.  He savoured their exclamations of pain and rage, and doubled his efforts, finally feeling as if he was presented with a challenge. 

After so long, he could finally hunt the Eclipse, and the feeling of freedom was almost euphoric.  Nil settled into a dance that had been too long forgetting, pivoting and whirling in time to the sharp staccato of his heartbeat.  Bodies fell around him; the screams of the dying added another layer to the symphony that he wove with his bow and spear. 

Finally, there was only one warrior left. 

He barely noticed when he was cut with a well-aimed arrow, only turning to look when the spray of blood cut across his field of vision.  His shoulder erupted with pain, sending bolts of searing heat into his arm.  He stopped for a fraction of a second to inspect the cut, and once he saw that the man who had wounded him had cast off his strange mask and was watching him for signs of weakness, he turned his head and slowly licked the blood off of his shoulder. 

Just as he’d hoped, the enemy’s eyes widened and he stumbled backwards as Nil, now with a mouth covered in the jarring scarlet liquid, stalked towards him.  Nil broke into a trot, then a jog, then a sprint to catch his prey, chuckling as the man scrambled to crest a large pile of debris that blocked his exit. 

Nil was too focused to pay any attention to the explosions that continued to shatter Meridian around them, too focused on snuffing out the insignificant life of his prey to notice that the sound of the Oseram cannons had stopped. 

He finally got close enough to the last remaining Eclipse soldier to grab him by his clothing and yank him around, ignoring the frantic yelping and scrabbling of short nails along his forearm in a futile attempt to ward him off.  Nil smiled slowly, savouring the dilation of his prey’s eyes and the frantic rise and fall of his chest as he looked death in the eye.

Slowly, just slowly enough to ensure agony, Nil slid the point of Aloy’s stolen knife between his ribs, making a sound that was almost akin to a moan as his victim let out a soft wheeze, his blood spilling down the handle of the weapon and staining Nil’s hands.  The light began to fade from his dark eyes, and Nil’s silver gaze remained flinty, unyielding as he drew every last second of satisfaction out of his kill. 

Finally, when his quarry had fallen limp and his eyes no longer glistened with terror, he placed him on the ground and withdrew the knife, taking a look at his surroundings for the first time in an hour.  The city was oddly silent. 

He could still hear the sounds of the dying, the muffled sobs and frantic gasps for air that marked the mortally wounded.  He felt something that was almost a flash of pity; he didn’t like to see innocent people pay for the mistakes of wicked men. 

He glanced up as he saw a flash of red hair flit across his peripherals.  Aloy was injured; cradling her ribs with one hand as she frantically sprinted towards the spire.  Something in his chest fluttered as he watched her go, suddenly concerned for her. 

Nil followed her gaze, his brow furrowing as he took in the sight of some sort of strange machine, being pulled along towards the summit of the sphere.  Aloy’s terrified expression was seared into his brain as he watched her go.  A lone ravager suddenly sprang of the charred remains of a large storehouse, running after her. 

She turned at the sound of mechanical joints, her hand flying to her bow as she struggled to pull air into her chest.  He knew that she had at least one cracked rib, and the unfamiliar tang of anger suddenly flooded into his mouth. 

“Aloy, go!  I’ll handle this!”  He roared, sprinting into her sightline. "I'll meet you at the Spire!" 

_I can’t let her die.  She’s the only one who can end this fight._

Without thinking, he steadied his spear and threw it with all of his might.  It flew true, striking the ravager in its firing turret, preventing it from attacking Aloy from a distance.  It pivoted to face him, metallic joints creaking and corruption hissing and dissolving into smoke as it poured out on the numerous small fires that flickered around its body. 

Nil bared his teeth, dropping into a fighting stance as he unshouldered his bow.  If he couldn’t be the one to destroy the metal demons, he sure as hell wasn’t going to let Aloy die. 

He was going to fight until his last breath.  His battle cry sprang from his lips as he charged the great metal beast, watching as Aloy darted up a hill towards the Spire. 

The final fight had begun. 

The ravager snarled, lashing out at him with one giant, armored paw. 

 


	6. Conclusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the battle of Meridian, Nil finds Aloy in the Embrace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I can't believe that this story is finished. Thank you to everyone who supported me throughout the writing of this series! I love this pairing so much, don't be surprised if I write something else at some point (please yell at me if I publish it before I'm done with my other fics cause apparently I'm a glutton for punishment). I hope you enjoy this final chapter, as always, I'd love to hear your thoughts. :) xx

Aloy sighed, tilting her head back to feel the warmth of the setting sun on her skin.  The wind whistled through the thigh-high grass around her, rustling the plants and sending twinkling fireflies spinning into the rapidly darkening dusk.  She paid no mind to the clicking and creaking of strider joints in the fields around her; after she’d defeated Hades the machines had returned to their docile states.  She doubted that the battle-type machines would ever be friendly, but at least they weren’t hunting for humans anymore.  The huffing and snuffling of the grazing machines was strangely therapeutic. 

She cracked her neck, stretching far enough to make her spine crack.  Her body finally relaxed, and she let out a huff as she thought.  Her mind was split into two halves of an argument. 

Half of her was content to spend the next year in the Embrace, hunting and living her life as part of the Nora, and the other half was determined to find every last bunker and devour every last shred of information that she could about Elisabet Sobek and the Alphas of Project Zero Dawn.  She couldn’t shake her gut feeling that she would choose the latter; she’d seen and experienced too much to be content with the life that she’d once craved. 

Absently, she ran a hand over her shoulder, her fingers grazing over half-scabbed over battle wounds and the cool tissue of old scars.  The battle for Meridian was over, and Hades had been deleted.  The electrocution of the master override had taken a major toll on her body; she was just starting to feel like herself again, three weeks after the battle. 

She would never forget the explosions that had rocked Meridian, the cries of the dying, and the overwhelming hopelessness that had washed over her as she’d looked death in the eye.  Aloy had stood with mankind’s greatest fighters and defeated the one thing that would have guaranteed destruction for them all. 

It was strange to her that she still felt like the same person, despite everything that she’d been through since the Proving. 

She doubted that every single member of the Eclipse had been defeated.  It was just a matter of time before the tribes found themselves embroiled in another pointless war over land or resources.  If her time spent in the ruins of the Zero Dawn project bunkers had taught her anything, it was that mankind followed the same patterns, time and time again.  Aloy wasn’t sure where the oncoming threat would come from, but she would always be ready to protect her home. 

As soon as she figured out where home was, that is.  She wove her hands into the grass around her, her mind still whirring over the loose ends that she’d left unfinished. 

Idly, she wondered what had happened to Sylens.  He’d just disappeared, not even rising to the insults that she’d thrown his way through the focus to try and get his attention.  She’d even checked at his lab, but she’d found nothing. 

There was something that still bothered her about him, but she knew better than to waste energy worrying about an enemy that may or may not exist. 

But that didn’t matter for the moment; the planet was saved from the only threat that could have destroyed it.  She sat down in the grass and leaned back on her elbows, watching as the sun dipped below the peaks of the valleys that cradled the Embrace.  She had found what she had been searching for, against all odds.  She tapped her hand against her focus, activating the data file that she’d paused from earlier.

Her mother’s voice echoed from the device. 

She felt the corners of her mouth ticking up, focusing on the soothing sound of GAIA and Elisabet Sobek’s voices in her ear. 

_“-sarcasm is hard to explain, even to humans.”_

_“Please, I’d like to learn to decipher it.  It will make it easier to pacify and distract the Alphas in times of stress if I can learn to recognize it.”_

Elisabet sighed deeply, and Aloy pictured her crossing her arms and frowning, trying to find the best wording. 

_“Okay, if you were to ask me how my day is going and it’s not going well, then I might respond that it’s a perfect, wonderful day in a stressed tone of voice.  That would be an example; I’m not actually having a good day.”_

_“May I ask a question?”_   GAIA’s calm voice asked, an unfamiliar note of confusion colouring her soft tone.

_“Of course.”_

_“Why would you not tell the truth?  In the pragmatic sense, would sarcasm not be considered a lie?”_

Elisabet laughed softly.  _“You’re not wrong.  Humans use sarcasm to help with…feelings or situations that are often distressing.”_

_“I am still struggling to understand the concept,”_ GAIA admitted, sounding surprisingly human as she trailed off.  Aloy couldn’t help but agree; sometimes she had a hard time recognizing it too.  Humans were stupidly complicated sometimes. 

_“Here’s a more relevant example.  If you were taking substantially longer to process code than usual, we might say that you are working at too fast of a pace for us mere humans,”_ Dr. Sobek said pointedly. 

_“That was sarcasm, the inflection pattern was different.  You are making a gentle mockery of me.”_ GAIA’s tone was neutral, but Aloy’s expression broke out in a grin as she heard the tiny undercurrent of excitement underneath her words.  _“That’s not a compliment.”_

_“Correct.  You’re learning quickly.”_

_“It’s what you built me for.  May I ask another question?”_

_“You don’t have to ask.  Go ahead.”_

_“Is sarcasm the same thing as a calming bedside manner?  If it brings comfort, should it not be used to-“_

_“Okay, I might need to explain that part a little bit better,”_ Elisabet interjected hastily, her overly cheerful words masking her concern over a major semantics argument.  _“There are certain situations where sarcasm isn’t appropriate at all.  A meeting with the Alphas for example-“_

Aloy stopped listening so intently and stared up at the stars above her head.  They’d winked into her vision as the sun had slid behind the mountains, and she simply watched them shimmer in the wide-open sky.  The light of the moon filtered down, bathing everything around her in a silver light. 

Silver. 

The corner of her mouth ticked up as she considered something else that she’d stubbornly refused to think about until now.  Aloy hadn’t seen Nil since he’d disappeared right after the final battle at the Spire.  He’d run off into the smoky mesa around Meridian; she wasn’t sure if she’d ever see him again.

She would never admit it out loud, but she missed Nil.  It wasn’t love, and it certainly wasn’t his constant determination to win philosophical arguments.  It was something about the way that he’d stubbornly wormed himself into her life and refused to take no for an answer that had evoked a strange kind of admiration in her. 

For someone who had been on the fringes of Nora society for so long, the idea that someone would incessantly attempt to spend time with her or find her attractive was strangely exhilarating.  She had her issues with the way that he thought, and his love for killing, but she couldn’t deny that her stomach did flip-flops when she thought about the way that he looked at her. 

Her thoughts were interrupted as she heard rustling in the grass, too close for her to ignore.  She immediately rolled to her feet, crouching with her hand outstretched towards her bow.  Her muscles were tense, and she took a sharp breath as she finally came face to face with the creature that had made the noise. 

Nil grinned at her, his white teeth flashing in the moonlight as he offered her a weapon, handle first.  “Aloy,” was all that he said by way of greeting, and she felt her brow furrowing, even as her muscles relaxed and she straightened up. 

“How did you get into the Embrace?”  She demanded, already full well aware that he would have no trouble sneaking past the sentries who guarded the entrance to the Nora lands.  A small glimmer of admiration bloomed in her chest, and she couldn’t help feeling slightly nervous and excited to see him.  If he’d dared to trespass into the heart of the Nora lands, there had to be a compelling reason for the risk.

“The same way that you came in,” he murmured, looking at her with his ancient eyes. “Unless you took the front door, but I doubt that.”

She supressed an eye roll; she’d snuck in as well.  Aloy had been bombarded with constant praise and adoration since the battle, all that she wanted was a little bit of anonymity.  Short of chopping her hair off, sneaking around was about the best thing she could do to get some peace and quiet. 

“Have you been watching me?”

“No, but I know you.  You prefer to work from the shadows and let others take the credit.  Of course you came back to the place that you called your home,” he said quietly, his tone deepening as he strode towards her.  Aloy’s competing emotions told her to run away but also to throw herself into his arms.  She settled for a mixture of the two and held her ground, holding her hand out for the weapon that he offered her.

“Don’t misunderstand, I’m not going to kill you with this,” she said firmly, trying to hide the fact that her palms suddenly felt clammy as heat poured through her veins when his fingers brushed against hers. 

“You might.”

The look in his eyes made her veins thrum with want, but she forced herself to pay attention to the knife that he was still offering her.  Her eyes narrowed when she realized that it was _her_ knife, and he’d _stolen_ it.  Her head snapped up and she gave into the bolt of anger that shot through her.  She’d tried to use it during the battle for Meridian, only to discover that it wasn’t in her knife belt.  She’d assumed that she’d dropped it somewhere, to her great frustration. 

“Why would you take it?  What if I had really needed this knife in Meridian?”  She demanded angrily, clenching her fingers around the handle.  The twinkle in his eye pissed her off even more and he even dared to _smirk_ at her. 

“You did just fine without it,” he purred, stepping closer.  She was too annoyed to pay her racing heartbeat any mind.  But she couldn’t ignore the way that the trickle of heat in her belly ignited as his warm breath puffed across her neck when he bent to whisper in her ear. 

“You didn’t even notice that I took it.  I expected better from you, Aloy.”

Her jaw clenched, and she raised a hand to grab firmly onto his vest, glaring at him.  “I expected you to have more honour than that,” she snapped, relishing the way that his eyes darkened.  “Honourable men don’t steal from their allies.”

“Careful, Nora,” he murmured, a flash of dark anger flitting across his bright eyes as she sheathed her knife and continued to glare at him.

“Or what?”  She said, just as quietly, daring him to continue.  “First you steal what’s mine, and then you taunt me?  I expected better from _you_.”

“That was your mistake,” he said darkly, inching closer to her.  She held her breath for a second before replying.  “You should have me figured out by now.”

“I assumed that you would know better than to try to trick me into getting mad and attacking you,” Aloy said sharply, her tone halfway between pleading and angry.  “Stop playing games with me.”

“The game is the hunt, Aloy,” he purred, darting forwards and kissing her hard.  She resisted for a moment, pushing him away and holding him at arm’s length. 

“Why did you come here?”  She panted hard as she tried to talk; trying to calm her racing heart and cool the fire raging through her veins as he watched her with what she assumed was his version of irritation.

“Stop thinking.  You’re undoing all of my hard work,” he told her quietly, threading his hands into her hair and gently tipping her head back.  “Our sun has yet to set.”

Before she could ask him what that meant, his mouth was on hers again, hot and desperate, and not at all gentle.  Aloy responded with equal force, attacking with teeth and tongue until he made a sound that was almost a whimper. 

Somehow, her hands had wound into his hair, and she finally couldn’t take it anymore.  She forced herself away to breathe for a moment, taking in his smouldering stare and heated skin as his gaze locked onto hers. 

“This is it,” she said breathlessly, pressing herself closer as his arms snaked around her waist.  “This is the last time that we’ll see each other.”

He made a small sound of disbelief and pulled her upwards to meet his lips again, his sure hands making quick work of her armour.  She let him, pushing him down to the ground and straddling his hips with no hesitation.  The rapidly cooling night air made her skin erupt with goosebumps, and she shivered as his warm hands slid across the expanse of her back and chest. 

He was everywhere, ravishing all of his attention on her as she sighed and moaned above him.  There was a part of her that wanted to ask him to stay with her in the Embrace, but she knew that whatever was going on between them had to end. 

She fumbled to undo the tie that held his trousers shut, groaning with frustration that he’d tied the knot too tight, _again_.  They shared a brief moment of mirth as he attempted to help her, his nimble fingers clumsy with haste.  Then, finally, she sank down on top of him, trying to catch her breath as he rolled his hips up into hers, his hands digging into her hips as he fought to hold onto his control. 

Aloy savoured every moan that she ripped out of his lips as she settled into a rhythm that had him gasping and twitching beneath her. 

Their coupling was wild, and desperate, and filled with such finality that it was all that Aloy could do to punch down her conflicted feelings on the matter.  She couldn’t think of anything else but him, not when he guided her to move against him, not when he made her body feel things that were still so wonderfully foreign.  She could hear herself making desperate sounds as her hips shuddered, drawing her firmly towards the edge. 

Too soon, she felt her muscles tense and then release in one wave, shattering her vision into fragments of white.  A surge of pleasure shot through her body, reaching into every inch of her and bringing with it the kind of exhausted bliss that she’d only ever felt with Nil.  She fought to catch her breath as Nil followed her over the edge a moment later, her name falling from his lips in a broken cry. 

She collapsed next to him, still breathing hard.  Her mind was completely hazy, and she took a moment to appreciate the clarity of not being able to think.  Nil sat up almost immediately, running a hand through his hair as he surveyed her, pale under the moonlight. 

“We’ll never be truly finished, you and I,” he finally said softly, staring up at the moon as he spoke.  “There are no more bandit camps, but there will always be terrible men who do terrible things.”

“I don’t need those fights anymore, Nil,” Aloy said tiredly, sitting up to get dressed.  “My war is over.”

“You won’t ever be content going back to the life that you thought you wanted,” he replied, reaching over to run a hand through her fiery hair.  She stiffened, staring at him with confusion.  He had never touched her like this before, softly and reverently, outside of passion. 

“I don’t agree,” she said eventually, trying to ignore the rush of sorrow that threatened to overwhelm her.  “I found what I wanted.”

“Yes, you did.  But you don’t know what you want _now_ ,” he murmured, looking at her with an enigmatic look in his eye.  “You will always want something; it is the nature of man.”

“And what do you want?”  She asked, her heart feeling like it was about to jump into her throat.  She didn’t know what she wanted him to say.  She didn’t know if she wanted to say goodbye, even if it was for the best. 

“You know what my life entails,” he replied cryptically, still watching her as she got dressed.  “Two sides of a constantly spinning shard.  I’ll fight, I’ll prevent the deaths of as many people as I can, and then I will die.”

“You said it yourself, there are no more bandit camps-“

“The scum who ravage the earth are everywhere, Aloy.  There will always be a need for someone like me, just as there will always be a need for someone like you.”

“There is no one like me,” Aloy said, her words tinged with bitterness.  He had no idea just how different she was.  There was a small part of her that wondered if he would change his mind about her if he knew that she was, for all intents and purposes, a clone of a woman who had lived a thousand years ago. 

“Yes and no.”

His cryptic reply made her roll her eyes.    

“No, really,” she said firmly, standing up and buckling her chest piece back on.  “I’m not what you think I am.  There will never be another person like me.”

He let out a short laugh, catching her hand as she moved to fasten her greaves.  “You’re too literal, Aloy.  Listen to what I’m saying.  You are the light, and I am the dark.  We will always be drawn together.”

“I don’t-“

“The dichotomy is what drives all of us.  I can always find you, and you will always know where I will be.  There aren’t any more bandits, or the Eclipse, but there will always be something that brings us together in battle.”

She just looked at him, trying to ignore the way that her heart’s uneven staccato against her ribs skipped a beat when he spoke to her like that. 

“Nil-“

“Don’t,” he interrupted her, pulling her towards him until she lay next to him in the long grass once more.  “Just accept it.”

“And if I don’t?”

“Then you will spend the rest of your life chasing smoke,” he said softly, moving so that he was raised up on one elbow, staring down at her with his striking eyes.  “You are the flame, not the smoke or the ash.”

“I don’t even know what that means,” she whispered, unable to tear her eyes away from him as he smirked. 

“Figure it out.”

She lost herself in the feel of his mouth against hers.  When he finally pulled away, she couldn’t remember what they’d been talking about. 

“No one can know that you’re in Nora lands,” she finally murmured, shivering as his mouth traced along her pulse point. 

“If you don’t tell anyone, they won’t.”

“Don’t kill anyone,” she warned, trying and failing to be stern as he looped his arm underneath her knee and shifted so that his body was flush against hers.

“I don’t kill unless I’m given a good reason to,” he said firmly, his tone indicating that he was offended by her request. 

“Yes, you do.”

“Mmhm, no.” 

She could barely string together enough thought to remember what he’d said as his hands made quick work of her clothes once again.   She didn’t want to stop him, and she didn’t have the energy to pretend that she didn’t want him as badly as he wanted her. 

“But I’m still not like you,” she said with difficulty, as his hot mouth marked a path down her stomach.  “I don’t seek out pleasure like you-“

She cut off as a rush of liquid heat overrode her ability to think, clenching her eyes shut as Nil patiently waited for her to dredge up enough brainpower to finish her sentence.

“-um, and I don’t kill because I get a rush out of it.  We’re not the same-“

She knew that she was rambling, but there was very little rational thought swirling around in her brain as Nil continued to use his mouth to drive her insane.  She let out a whimper as her hips twitched, her hands latching onto his muscular arm as he pinned her hips to the ground. 

“I clearly didn’t do a good enough job of teaching you, that yes, in fact you are,” he said quietly, his lips curling into a smirk against her skin as his voice rumbled through her body.  “Just. Like. Me. We’re-”

He cut off with a muted grunt of pain as her nails tore his skin, leaving small welts that immediately filled with pinpricks of blood.  He didn’t seem to be bothered by it, in fact, he simply doubled his efforts, making her back arch off the ground and her hastily smothered moan ring out across the fields where they lay. 

Aloy couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t do anything but ride out the flash of white-hot pleasure that threatened to engulf her.  That was how it was with Nil. 

There was always frustration, always an argument, always a cautious truth.  Now, as she had learned, there was more to life than pain.

There was always heat, and there was always blood. 

It wasn’t until she stared up at the sky afterwards, taking in the sight of the dawn light streaking across the valley, that she understood. 

The sun would always set, but the sun would also always rise. 

She glanced over at Nil’s sleeping form, absorbing the sight of his mussed hair and slightly rosy cheeks as he slept deeply.  Aloy stood up quietly, dressing and strapping on her weapons.  With a small smile firmly in place on her mouth, she reached down to her scabbard and dropped her hunting knife, point down, into the ground. 

Then she turned on her heel and walked away, making almost no sound as she left the tall grass.  Her strider mount was exactly where she’d left it, grazing contentedly.  It looked up at her, making a small noise that was almost a coo as she patted it absentmindedly.  Swinging herself up into the saddle, she looked back over her shoulder.  

After a moment, she nudged the strider into a trot, making her way back to the ruins of the Ancient Ones.  There was still so much to learn, so much to understand about them.  She knew now that she wanted to know everything about Elisabet Sobek. 

Besides, it didn’t really matter where she went, Nil would find her eventually. 

She tapped her focus, restarting the data log that she had been listening to.

_“If you’re going to use sarcasm, you should practice with me first,”_ Elisabet said emphatically, clearly struggling to find a diplomatic way to tell GAIA that she was hopeless at it. 

_“It may be too complex for me at this point in my development,”_ GAIA agreed softly, her musical voice soothing in Aloy’s ears.  _“Perhaps you could enlighten me on another subject?”_

“Of course,” Elisabet answered immediately.  Aloy could imagine her smiling gently with relief.  _“What do you want to know?”_

_“Idioms are even more perplexing.  They are often both literal and figurative, are they not?”_

_“Uh, yeah.  That’s another complicated question; I only have an hour until my meeting.  Can we talk about biology today instead?”_

_“Of course.  I find frogs particularly fascinating.  Their mouths take up an overwhelming percentage of their body mass, but their small legs are powerful enough to propel them with great force towards food.”_

_“I could say the same about Travis,”_ Elisabet said drily. 

Aloy felt a grin slide across her mouth; she couldn’t help laughing at her mother’s response.  She’d seen enough of the holographic data files to conclude that she was probably correct about Travis. 

She trotted off into the dawn, watching as the sky morphed from a golden glow into the bright blue of a true spring morning. 

 

 

 

 


End file.
